by twicethepersonioncewas / 10/18/2016 at 1:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's been a death in the family, then abruptly hangs up. I speed home, to find my mother holding the tiny corpse of a fish that she got 2 weeks ago. I got fired for being late to work. FML
by JoeyTheJedi / 10/17/2016 at 8:31pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
ragnarok1540's comment : Did you not think to call into to work to mention that you would be late because of a family emergency? Showing up late without prior notice is pretty irresponsible (unless you were in an emergent situation that rendered you unable to call ... such as you had a heart attack or were trapped under a 10 car pileup or something.) Also, I know it's never nice to loose a pet, but to be so hysterical in a situation like this is odd. While it seems like poor judgement on your mothers part to call you, if she was truly upset, it may indicate a more serious issue such as depression.
Today, in a department store, a woman with a parrot sitting on her shoulder was trying to return a coffee maker. She explained that she had to return the coffee maker because the bird didn't like it sitting on the kitchen counter. FML
by oped01 / 10/17/2016 at 8:15pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I found out how my salesmen are "entertaining" themselves since they were told they can't have their cell phones on them. They are pulling straws to see who will pretend to trip and fall face-first onto the floor in front of customers. FML
by bossproblems / 10/17/2016 at 2:47pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I told the doctor that one of my ribs sticks out farther than the other. When I lifted my shirt to show him, he immediately laughed and said, "Whoa, that's not subtle is it!" As if I wasn't already insecure about it. FML
by justmyluck5150 / 10/17/2016 at 1:58pm / United States / Health
by StillAVirgin / 10/17/2016 at 11:23am / Denmark / Love
by HRomero / 10/17/2016 at 9:17am / United States (New York) / Work
mermaidkeels's comment : Tell him you're too busy looking for a job to spend time with him. If he is still your boyfriend, that is.
by dez / 10/16/2016 at 1:05am / United States (Kentucky) / Work
by LittleLou / 10/16/2016 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy
Tripartita's comment : And that's when it occurred to you why your mother is 30 and your grandmother is 45.
Today, while on the skytrain, a woman leaned on the railing bar that I was holding onto, crushing my hand. My first instinct was to move my hand when she turned around and began loudly yelling at me for, "Touching her waist" and "Sexually harassing" her. FML
by Whyudodis / 10/01/2016 at 3:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation
by RjsBabe / 10/01/2016 at 2:14am / United States (California) / Intimacy