Today, I found out that whenever my roommate's friend-with-benefits comes over, he uses my bikini trimmer to shave his pubic hair. I've been using that trimmer for months. FML

by Grosssss / 07/15/2016 at 12:08pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

RememberSchlitz's comment : Go buy a new one and hide it for your use. Dip the cutting edges of the old one in capsaicin oil before he comes over. Hilarity shall ensue.

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Today, I bought my mother an expensive TV she had been looking at. After I bought it, she continued browsing for more stuff. I told her I couldn't afford the extra items. She got mad and called me "selfish". FML

by SwingingGallows / 07/15/2016 at 11:43am / Money

jimeple's comment : So return the tv

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Today, after giving a potential employee a drug test and instructing her to leave her urine sample in the bathroom, she not only brought it into the office, she spilled it on the front desk. FML

by gross / 07/14/2016 at 11:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

floridagreg's comment : That would really "piss" me off.

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Today, I'm studying abroad in Japan. For the first time, I had to ride the train home from school alone. My host sister told me which train and the time it left. I sat down on the train, feeling proud of myself when I realized she didn't tell me what stop was ours, and I barely speak Japanese. FML

by Tryingmybest / 07/14/2016 at 5:44pm / Japan (Akita) / Transportation

Today, I got lost in Darkfall Passage in Skyrim and got so frustrated I turned off the game and cried. Thank you pregnancy hormones. FML

by SkyrimGamerMoM / 07/14/2016 at 3:49pm / United States (North Dakota) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

by FrozenAnonymus / 07/14/2016 at 2:05pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Animals

Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML

by CasperTheFriendlyGhost / 07/14/2016 at 1:11pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I entered a restaurant just to use the WiFi. In order not to look cheap, I ordered a meal and a beverage. The WiFi didn't work and now I don't have enough money to buy dinner. FML

by decenthumanbeing / 07/14/2016 at 9:13am / Money

Today, my drinking habit hit a new low when I waited almost an hour to go to the liquor store after it opened because I didn't want to seem desperate. FML

by foxfur / 07/14/2016 at 8:21am / United States (Vermont) / Health

Today, I went into labor. I called my mother to ask her to drive me to the hospital. She wanted me to wait for her to take a nap first. FML

Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2016 at 8:56pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today at camp, we were choosing teams for capture the flag. It's embarrassing to be chosen last, but today I learnt it's even more embarrassing to not be chosen at all. FML

by lastinclass / 07/13/2016 at 5:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my giant Game of Thrones tattoo finished. Despite the fact that I had spelt it out for him, the artist wrote 'You no nothing John Snow'. It's the focal part of the tattoo. FML

by Heknowsnothing / 07/13/2016 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous