By - 25/2/2020 22:00 Her revenge Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML I agree, your life sucks 1462 You deserved it 635 30 7 24 99 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 26/2/2020 01:00 Nothing Today, I realized that I'm on the top of not having my drivers license/ state ID (I was submitting my taxes and needed it) I also threw away my brand new passport because I thought it was trash in my boyfriends car. FML I agree, your life sucks 440 You deserved it 2233 20 5 20 76 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 20:00 Fight Club Today, my girlfriend asked how I was feeling, because I’ve been feeling down and experiencing a lot of anxiety lately. I said was feeling a lot better and that I finally think I’m on my way to getting well. She didn't agree, and started a fight about it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1677 You deserved it 153 88 5 35 22 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 14:00 Knock out Today, I treated myself to a Thai massage. The masseuse was so aggressive and intense, she left me with injuries on my hands and back. I paid $60 for someone to hurt me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1487 You deserved it 310 25 4 50 80 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 18:00 I miss him Today, after a 6 month dry spell, my husband was yet again “too tired” to have sex. I guess I finally found something I miss about my ex. FML I agree, your life sucks 2089 You deserved it 369 158 6 12 53 27 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/2/2020 20:00 That's a mother Today, my mom and I got into a fight about a topic we agreed on. Seems like we're destined to never get along. FML I agree, your life sucks 2409 You deserved it 290 78 11 11 130 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 02:00 Incomprehensible Today, I arrived in Tokyo and went to stay overnight in a teeny airport cabin hotel with shared bathroom facilities. I used the little wicker baskets to put my clothes on and when I came out of the shower, I found someone had stolen my favorite top. Who steals dirty clothes?! FML I agree, your life sucks 2789 You deserved it 316 123 6 47 60 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/2/2020 01:00 Very good remedy Today, after suffering with anxiety and insomnia for a nearly a year and exhausting every natural remedy, I could think of, I finally decided to go to a Dr. for help. Instead of writing me a prescription, he told me to drink more teas and think happy thoughts. I had to pay out of pocket for this. FML I agree, your life sucks 1839 You deserved it 195 105 3 43 38 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 20:00 Too dry Today, I spent the evening with my new wife at the doctor’s because she thought she had a UTI. The doctor sent the nurse to talk to us because he was too embarrassed to tell us that we just needed to use more lube. FML I agree, your life sucks 1649 You deserved it 319 12 6 6 246 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 18:00 My dear neighbor Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML I agree, your life sucks 1980 You deserved it 103 14 4 140 33 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 21/2/2020 14:00 No chance Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML I agree, your life sucks 1389 You deserved it 815 37 7 6 125 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 21/2/2020 01:00 The innocence of children Today, my 5 year old stabbed me in the back with a pencil because I stole her nose and wouldn’t give it back. My daughter has been sulking now for 3 hours and refuses to breathe until she has her nose. FML I agree, your life sucks 1549 You deserved it 528 18 2 29 197 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 20/2/2020 18:00 So shite Today, my date left the restaurant because I didn’t agree with his opinions about the mentally disabled or mixed race couples, etc. Basically, a real scumbag. He also left me the bill, and it turned out he had all the most expensive menu items, including a £120 bottle of wine. It cost over £300 total. FML I agree, your life sucks 2081 You deserved it 298 26 9 152 28 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 20/2/2020 14:00 My alarm Today, yet again, I woke up at the sound of my parents having sex like apes, and couldn't get back to sleep. FML I agree, your life sucks 1779 You deserved it 206 11 7 34 149 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 20/2/2020 01:00 It's just me Today, I stopped by my elderly mother’s house to drop off some groceries. I decided to clean the place while I was there, just to be nice. In true Three Bears fashion, I fell asleep on the couch. I was awoken by a police officer pointing his gun at me. My mom woke up and thought I was a burglar. FML I agree, your life sucks 1890 You deserved it 187 10 3 41 147 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 19/2/2020 20:00 Just once Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML I agree, your life sucks 1771 You deserved it 165 44 4 12 101 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/2/2020 14:00 Pissed Today, I went to the hospital, which was super busy. I did a pee test when I first arrived. After 5 hours of waiting, they told me they'd lost my pee. How do you lose someone's piss? FML I agree, your life sucks 1606 You deserved it 106 16 8 15 108 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 19/2/2020 01:00 Don't care Today, I realized that I'm a horrible uncle, I have two nephews and I don't know their age nor birthday. They are twins. FML I agree, your life sucks 652 You deserved it 1474 21 6 15 113 21 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 18/2/2020 14:00 Bad liar Today, I was supposed to see my boyfriend for his birthday. He said his parents were coming down and it may not be a good time for us to really enjoy each other. Last night I saw a picture of him feeding popcorn to baby llamas with his drunk stoner friends. FML I agree, your life sucks 1541 You deserved it 208 30 7 12 110 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 17/2/2020 18:00 When karma does its job Today, I found out the guy whose ass I used to routinely kick in high school is now dating my 19 year-old daughter. FML I agree, your life sucks 783 You deserved it 4369 25 15 43 331 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 16/2/2020 14:00 Oh gosh Today, I noticed a strange mark on the inside of my mouthwash bottle. As I was bending down to investigate, my hands tightened around the bottle and mouthwash squirted in my eye. It still burns. FML I agree, your life sucks 1302 You deserved it 608 10 2 12 115 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Thescarlettfox - 16/2/2020 01:00 Monster in my bathroom Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML I agree, your life sucks 1324 You deserved it 799 7 6 9 166 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 15/2/2020 01:00 Too stupid Today, I was picking my nose so aggressively that I flicked a booger right into my eye. FML I agree, your life sucks 428 You deserved it 2039 14 4 16 133 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 14/2/2020 05:00 Pain in the neck Today, my mom drove my car and ran had to make a u turn on a narrow street. Instead of slowing down, she speeds to turn running off the road and denting my car. Make it worse, she blamed me for not giving her good directions. Then follows up with it is not that bad. FML I agree, your life sucks 1414 You deserved it 216 68 3 39 21 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 13/2/2020 19:00 I don't care Today, my girlfriend sent me a revenge video of her having sex with another guy, because I cheated on her. I got angry with her, but later used the video to masturbate. FML I agree, your life sucks 578 You deserved it 4460 58 16 37 390 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 12/2/2020 14:00 - United States Almost father Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML I agree, your life sucks 22051 You deserved it 108614 39 8 92 246 822 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/2/2020 14:00 My husband's passion Today, my husband loves his cat more than our new baby daughter. This morning he spent 2 hours playing with the cat, yet when I handed him his flesh and blood daughter, he found an excuse to hand her back after 5 minutes, then 5 minutes after that, he was playing with the cat again. FML I agree, your life sucks 1636 You deserved it 312 123 4 24 86 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 10/2/2020 20:00 Waste moment Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We decided then to come home and planned an intimate moment. I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I fell asleep right before we started. FML I agree, your life sucks 913 You deserved it 1159 16 8 11 144 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/2/2020 18:00 Chubby life Today, I was tying my hair up when my dad rubbed my stomach and asked how his grandchild was doing. He knows I'm not pregnant and that I've been trying really hard to lose weight. FML I agree, your life sucks 2337 You deserved it 248 180 6 56 74 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/2/2020 01:00 Where it is? Today, my girlfriend and I were doing the deed when she suddenly said, "Hold on babe, I think my nose ring fell out." After she couldn't find it for a minute, she said "I'm sure it's on the bed somewhere." Immediately after that, she yelled, "OH MY GOD I JUST SWALLOWED IT." FML I agree, your life sucks 1587 You deserved it 252 16 7 41 153 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, my boyfriend and I had a huge fight and broke up. We live in a house together and we are on quarantine. We both can’t leave the house and it is... I agree, your life sucks 59 You deserved it 11 0 Comments
Today my boyfriend who I live with told me that I needed to find another place to stay the worst part I gave up my apartment and quit my job a week ago... I agree, your life sucks 65 You deserved it 8 1 Comments
Today, when my girlfriend walked out the room, for a laugh, I covered my whole body except my knob in blankets. Then when I heard her come back in, I yelled,... I agree, your life sucks 378 You deserved it 153 3 Comments
Today, I went on a date with a guy I met on Tinder. After chatting in a pub, we went for a walk at the marina nearby. He tried to have sex with me bareback... I agree, your life sucks 1154 You deserved it 444 13 Comments
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