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The all-time greatest FMLs

By Anonymous - 18/06/2010 03:20 - United States

Today, after breaking up with my boyfriend, some of my friends decided to take me to a comedy club for a girls night. My friend's jealous husband decided he had to come along, then decided to invite my other friends' boyfriends. I ended up being the seventh wheel on a night meant to cheer me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 37

Honest day's work

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 02:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after finding out that I opened an Onlyfans account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 4 467

By thisblows - 11/04/2009 20:42 - United States

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 52

I don't belong here

By Biker - 20/08/2024 20:00 - Germany

Today, I met a "nice guy." Unfortunately, he called himself that after following me on his bike for one and a half hours in the opposite direction of where he was supposed to be going, just to "coincidentally" meet me again. Get lost, you fucking creep! FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 73

Get me out of here

By mirabelle - 06/11/2023 03:00

Today, my mom screamed at me for not saying “Thank you” after she gave me food. Yesterday, she screamed at me for thanking her. I’m 24 and can’t afford to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 122

Red thong, I mean red flag

By Anonymous - 07/10/2025 03:00

Today, I got the silent treatment from my boyfriend because my high waisted sweatpants accidentally slipped a little when I bent down, just as my creepy neighbor happened to walk by and my thong was exposed a little. The only thing he said to me all day was right before bed when he said, “Throw out that fucking underwear.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 117

Mixed signals

By Anonymous - 11/07/2025 20:00 - Netherlands - Creil

Today, my wife and I were having amazing make up sex after several months of painful separation. Halfway through, she screamed for me to stop, climbed off the bed, and ran into the bathroom. She spent an hour screaming and crying, then came out and emotionlessly told me to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 147

Oddly specific

By Anonymous - 06/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, I have no choice but to move back in with my mom and her husband, who are still married even though he's responsible for the house fire that killed my two younger brothers in 2013. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 78

Disreputable

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I was supposed to train a new hire, grateful to finally have someone else here with me on my shift. He didn't show up. I found out later that his mother didn't want him working here because she thinks he's too smart for this job. I found him working at the McDonald's a few blocks away. We pay more than they do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 90

Libs stop being cringe challenge

By I'mmessedup - 31/03/2022 10:00 - United States

Today, I can't go on the internet without seeing my stupid fuck of a president staring down a US serviceman while deep throating a slice of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 1 283

Bougie

By Anonymous - 27/03/2021 08:01

Today, I went to the Louis Vuitton store to repair the broken handle on my handbag. Upon review, they told me that my handbag was not an authentic Louis Vuitton. I essentially paid $1600 for a fake that I can no longer use. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 1 527

Plans can fall through and so often they do

By Anonymous - 03/12/2023 06:00 - Australia - Wacol

Today, I'm supposed to be starting on the first part of a 9 hour road trip. My only coworker called in sick, so instead I had to go into work. One hour there, one hour back, and a 9-to-5 day. This would have been my first holiday in 7 years. After getting to work, I realised I'd forgotten my work keys in my other clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 150

Moving on

By Anonymous - 20/01/2024 12:00 - United States - Waunakee

Today, a year after we agreed to a divorce, my wife and I are still married and living together because it's not financially possible for us to split. We get along well enough, but I'm ready to move on. She's already moving on, according to the boyfriend she's been seeing for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 167

Hilarious

By Anonymous - 21/10/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, its been three weeks since my boyfriend's "hilarious prank" went off. He hid a Bluetooth speaker in my son's room and played a scary clown laugh at 2am. Now my son won't even enter his room, much less sleep in it. My boyfriend had better learn to love sleeping on the sofa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 149

My name is

By my name is not Alex - 30/12/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, my boss keeps calling me by my coworker's name, no matter how many times I correct her. We all have nametags, and my coworker and I look nothing alike. There is absolutely no feasible way to confuse either of us at all, let alone all the time. I'm convinced she's doing it on purpose to test my patience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 94

Retail work sucks

By Anonymous - 11/07/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a very rude older woman came in wanting to buy her first laptop. After a full hour showing her laptops and all the stuff you can do with them, she decided she didn’t want one. As a bonus, she told my manager, “He’s not very good at his job, is he?” Walk toward the light, you grave-dodging old bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 123

Second opinion

By AngryAspy - 21/05/2023 10:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I asked if my psychiatrist would test me for autism, as I believe I may have it. His response? "You probably don't. Stay off social media once in a while." Well fuck me for wanting a professional opinion I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 741

Unfairly branded

By jake - 03/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, every girl I’ve dated since high school has falsely accused me and spread rumors of me beating them, and of being an “abusive boyfriend.” This is now my reputation around this city. The one thing they all have in common is they each cheated on me with the type of guy they accuse me of being. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 165

Stranger danger

By Cali Montana - 03/12/2024 09:00 - United States - Marietta

Today, I helped a 6 year-old boy who was left alone at a store to get back home. The kid's parents were grateful, but my mother cussed me out and called me stupid for helping the kid. No good dead goes unpunished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 91

Use protection

By Anonymous - 17/08/2022 12:00

Today, after I got pregnant off a dude who turned out to be married, and he'd told me he’d support me and the baby on the side, I had a miscarriage. Now he's pretending he doesn't even know me, and I can’t even tell his wife because without the baby, I can’t even prove we had sex that one time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 1 714

By Anonymous - 12/05/2009 17:39 - United States

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 24

Freeloader

By Anonymous - 09/02/2025 03:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I found out that I have at least stage 3 cancer. I went on my insurance's website to get information for the doctors. I also saw "Other people who have been on your plan." My ex-wife was listed, with a new last name. She got remarried. I'm just going to let the cancer take me at this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 114

Corruption, corruption everywhere

By Anonymous - 15/03/2025 12:00 - Czechia

Today, a student told me to "F*** off!" I reported it to my boss and the student's parent, who is also a teacher at the school. My boss deemed it a minor issue and said we wouldn't be following discipline policy. Now, my boss frequently visits my classroom to bully me, likely due to the two of them being drinking buddies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 96

Do you even lift bro?

By Dilemma - 28/11/2023 10:00

Today, my girlfriend has been nagging me to help her with her fantasy of being picked up and fucked in mid-air. I don't know how to tell her that its impossible until she loses about a hundred pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 204

Who are you? Who am I?

By NoDaddyIssues - 24/03/2024 22:00 - Netherlands - Alphen aan den Rijn

Today, I finally received the phone call I had been waiting on for years. The agency who is trying to approach my father in an attempt for me to get in contact with him called me with the news that they found him. Too bad he died about 25 years ago, so he can't consent with making himself known. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 106

Young love

By Anonymous - 21/12/2023 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son is actually going on holiday over Christmas with some girl he met in a bar. He’s barely known her a week and is already dipping into his savings to keep her happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 167

Let's get it on

By chief623 - 01/10/2023 22:00 - United States - Ashland

Today, I showered with my wife for the first time in months, so I was excited. Once we got in, she was adjusting the temperature to something more comfortable. She then turned around and tell me to suck in my gut. After I did so, I slipped and ate shit, smacking my head on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 144

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 12/06/2025 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son swears blind he didn’t take my car joyriding last night. Thing is, I reverse into the drive. He drove it back in facing forwards, but no matter how I tell him, he doesn’t get it because the car's in the drive, so there’s no evidence, right? IT’S FACING THE WRONG WAY DUMBASS, I KNOW YOU TOOK IT. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 100

Long time coming

By That was twelve years ago - 23/02/2025 09:00 - United States - Edison

Today, the girl I stalked in high school found me. I've since gotten therapy and fixed my attachment issues, but she told my fiancée the whole story anyway. Now I'm single and sleeping on my clothes in the back of a U-haul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 299

Leaking from everywhere

By Anonymous - 28/04/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 89

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The Top

Today, during work hours, I took time off and discreetly went for an interview for a prospective job at our rival company. As soon as I reached the place, I bumped into my current boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 378

You deserved it 8 656

Today, my cat tried to jump up to the window, and missed. This would have been hilarious if I had not been sleeping under that same window, and then caught him with my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 676

You deserved it 4 800

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 087

You deserved it 11 189

Today, the guy I like recommended I buy this computer game. Wanting to impress him, I agreed. Turns out it was a joke. I am now the proud owner of Microsoft Train Simulator 2005, and he can't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 677

You deserved it 37 341

Today, my train was canceled so my ticket expired by the time another train arrived. I was fined $90 by ticket inspectors 'cause my claim that the early train didn't run was "unsubstantiated". Leaving the train I was pushed by the crowd, fell, lost a shoe and had to walk home with one bare foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 174

You deserved it 2 750

Today, I was eating lunch with my wife. We were having a nice time when a man came up to me. He said, "Hey! Bill how are you?" I wasn't really sure, so being polite I said, "I'm sorry, I can't remember your name." He frowned and walked away. It was my company's Chairman of the Board. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 389

You deserved it 54 755