The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

Hair-raising

By w…… - 18/05/2024 22:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I have alopecia areata and I constantly have reappearing bald spots all over my head. I cannot properly grow a beard, and one of my eyes has no eyelashes. However, my nose hair seems to grow at the rate of an old man on biotin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 69

Weak

By Anonymous - 13/09/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend, who I thought was the one I’d one day marry, didn’t survive her first time meeting the extended family. My parents loved her, but my grandma, great grandma, aunties, and cousins gave her such a hard time that she ran out in tears, jumped on a bus, then broke up with me via text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 228

Freestyle

By Anonymous - 28/10/2024 22:00 - Germany - Jesteburg

Today, my dad gave a speech at my wedding. It started with, “Forty years ago, there was a tree…” and continued in the same vein about his work as a biologist. I might have been mentioned in passing. My new wife was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 86

Thanks, I guess?

By Alex - 04/09/2025 09:00 - Mexico - Mexico City

Today, after months of helping my girlfriend accommodate into her new apartment to escape from her abusive mother, she thanked me by posting an Instagram story with her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 90

Exploitation

By Anonymous - 28/04/2023 03:00

Today, if I'd known a few days ago when I agreed to help a friend film that it was going to be located so far away and cost so much to get there, I would have said no straight away. I won't even be reimbursed for my efforts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 225

Welcome!

By Annoyed - 27/04/2025 00:00 - Canada

Today, I invited a friend over for dinner and spent hours preparing a fancy meal. When I opened the door, he walked in with his new girlfriend, his mom, his sister, and his dog. I barely had enough food for one, let alone five. I ended up serving my fancy meal on paper plates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 83

Nokia 3310 FTW

By Anonymous - 17/03/2020 02:30 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, while taking a rather large crap, I sent my sister a joking text saying, "I'm shitting my ass inside out." Turns out I sent it to my entire list of contacts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 2 076

I'll see you in court

By UGGHhhhhh - 13/01/2026 00:00

Today, my nail client came with yet another sob story about a bill being on autopay and they took it from her account before her appointment. I set boundaries and said I won’t proceed until I’m paid in full (She owes over $300). She responded by trashing my shop. $1000 in nail polish supplies down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 67

Sorry for your loss

By TooReal - 25/04/2025 00:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, my mother messaged me via Facebook me to say that my father had died. They knew since the start of the year but didn't bother to tell me. I live 10 minutes from the hospital he was in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 101

Work is freedom, duh!

By Exhauster - 30/07/2025 09:00 - Netherlands

Today, I figured out how my wife sees things. When I'm at work, I don't have to deal with responsibilities at home. Thus, work is a mini-vacation, and since I take a mini-vacation every day, I should have no problem cooking dinner and cleaning for hours after work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 166

Calm your hormones, dude

By PinChi - 10/02/2022 00:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my girlfriend invited her sorority sister, who fled an abusive relationship, to live with us without asking me. This wouldn't be a problem, but her friend is easily two points hotter than her and…. thirsty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 1 935

No thanks left to give

By HoldingOn - 27/11/2023 00:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I've been job searching desperately for years. I'm always either rejected or the places just do not contact me, or they are too far away. No license and no cell service. Not even a Thanksgiving meal this year. I wanna give up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 148

Moral conundrum

By Nate - 09/09/2022 05:30

Today, my baby mama got her septum pierced. It's funny that if I called her a cow, she’d likely break up with me. But she gets the same ring in her nose as a cow, and NO ONE is supposed to notice that. I can only think of cows when I see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 983

Sleep cycles

By Anonymous - 29/08/2024 14:00 - United States - Washington

Today, my roommate gets up at 3:30am for work and wakes me up each time. I try not to complain about it, but whenever I come back to the apartment at midnight, she gets mad that I woke her up. I told her that she wakes me up in the morning, but apparently that’s different because she’s going to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 154

What is wrong with you?

By Anonymous - 30/03/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom - Castleford

Today, I had to inform my son that no, his genital warts will not just go away on their own, and if he ever wants to have sex with a decent woman again, he’ll take his stupid self to the doctor and get treated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 144

Force of habit

By Muscle memory - 02/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, there was a massive thunderstorm in my area. My first instinct - as well as my parents' - was to go to my sickly grandma's house and make sure she was okay, as she lives alone. As we prepared to step outside, we all remembered a rather crucial detail: My grandma is dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 181

How's about you go **** yourself, knobhead?

By Anonymous - 26/07/2023 06:00

Today, my boyfriend of four years told me that I have a potty mouth and that I should clean it with Harpic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 334

I'm a weirdo, I'm a creep

By Anonymous - 08/10/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, I was sitting behind some bushes in the dark enjoying the view, when some cops came and confiscated my night-vision goggles, then warned me for acting like a "creepy perv." FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 3 580

Insensitive

By WTF?! - 05/01/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I was the designated emotional support person for my friend's mom as she went to have her sick cat put down. The cat was aggressive towards the male vet. She said, "She doesn't like men" to which the vet replied, "Well, soon that won't be a problem." The willpower it took both of us to not yell at him, or worse… FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 285

Baseless accusation!

By Nasturtium - 05/09/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I threw up due to food poisoning. Despite my fever and pain, my wife is completely convinced it was from secretly drinking, and I am now "PERMANENTLY FORBIDDEN" from drinking anything alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 123

The agony and the ecstasy

By Anonymous - 01/05/2023 12:00

Today, I got home from my vacation. The last few days of my trip, I stayed at my father's house. I was having trouble sleeping last night so I decided to use a little "discreet" vibrator that I travel with. When I unpacked back home, I realized I'd forgotten the vibrator in my bed at my father's house. I'm mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 1 088

This whole marriage is a scam

By Anonymous - 17/04/2024 12:00

Today, we discovered that our wedding licence from 7 years ago is a complete fake. I don’t get it: we were married in a church by a priest, we got all our paperwork filed with the city council, but our certificate is apparently a fake someone made on a computer, and they got the date wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 99

Get it on

By Em. - 21/06/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I learned that my married mom has been having an affair with my best friend for over a year. When I tried to fight him, he knocked me on my ass and said, "Your mom is sexy, and your dad's tiny dick wasn't good enough for her. Don't screw this up for me or I'll beat your ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 142

UTI

By Anonymous - 09/01/2021 14:01 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, while studying in the library, I felt a sudden urge to pass gas. There were not too many people around, so I let it go while in my seat and it went unnoticed. What caught the attention of everybody was the puddle slowly forming under my seat. Turns out, I farted so hard I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 1 117

Step-nothing

By Anonymous - 05/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad's new wife, who is two years younger than me (I'm 24) and hates that I'm a lesbian, threw a fit when I told her that I would never call her Mom. My dad took her side. I don't live with them but still… FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 93

Taking no chances

By Anonymous - 27/08/2023 10:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was sent 800 km home from my interstate job because I have the sniffles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 134

FML's Who's Responsible…?

By Louis - 25/04/2017 21:30 - France - Saint-jean-de-braye

Can you work out who dunnit?

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 155

Cancel culture

By Anonymous - 18/12/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my insurance canceled my contract, claiming I hadn't paid, even though I had. I only discovered this because I backed into a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 121

Chemical warfare

By Anonymous - 09/04/2024 06:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, a sewer main broke just outside of where I work. It smells like a latrine here but we are not allowed to close down, and the county won't do anything about it for two weeks. The only upside is that I'm not dealing with many customers, but having to smell the entire city's feces is way worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 101

You done ****** up

By Anonymous - 13/01/2022 20:01 - South Africa - Bronkhorstspruit

Today, I briefed a developer to delete 57 email accounts. I sent the wrong screenshots; those were the ones the client asked to stay active. The clients now don't have access to their emails until the account gets restored. I feel like crawling into a hole and dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 1 282

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Work Money Divorce Education Health Miscellaneous Relatable Sports Love Abuse Kids Annoying Hospital Wanker Intimacy Addiction Management Language DIY Mysterious Awkward Cars Cooking Coworkers Anniversary Transportation Surgery Healthy Lifestyle Growing old

The Top

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 994

You deserved it 3 243

Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 973

You deserved it 4 624

Today, I ran into a girl I used to go to school with. We went out for dinner to catch up, and we ended up at my house, watching movies and cuddling. This fantastic and spontaneous date was concluded with several kisses. I dropped her off at her car and drove off. I forgot to get her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 753

You deserved it 64 229

Today, I was working at my desk and wearing my new noise cancelling headphones. I couldn’t hear anyone around me, so I let out a nice long fart. Every desk behind me was occupied and the fart was not silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 3 674

Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 934

You deserved it 503

Today, my roommate sings in his room a lot. He has a horrible singing voice, but his dog trying to harmonize with him by howling at the top of its lungs makes it even more unbearable. Worst duet performance ever. And he does it every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 729

You deserved it 134