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The all-time greatest FMLs

Superspreaders

By Anonymous - 17/10/2021 05:00

Today, I had dinner with my aunt and uncle recently. Halfway through, my uncle says, “This gravy tastes weird, does it taste OK to you? Oh sorry babe, I forgot you haven’t been able to smell or taste anything lately.” Well, into quarantine I go… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 151

Insulate Britain at it again

By Anonymous - 06/11/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, thanks to protestors blocking the M25, I missed the only job interview I’ve been invited to in 10 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 332

You deserved it 128

Just a prank, bruh!

By VoodooPriestess - 03/06/2020 23:00

Today, while looking at engagement rings online, I started crying. Not because I'm getting married, but because the only proposal scenario my mind could concoct always ended with my boyfriend saying, "SIKE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 332

You deserved it 478

Presumptuous

By not a bad mom - 13/06/2022 06:00 - United States

Today, I took my daughter to a makeup store at the mall to get foundation to match her skin. The woman behind the counter scoffed, rolled her eyes, then called me a Karen when I asked for a manager. My daughter is 7 and I was getting makeup to match her elf ears for a costume we were making. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 332

You deserved it 361

Out of my league

By Bibel_Boy_1993 - 18/11/2022 14:00 - Israel

Today, an attractive woman on a bus told my girlfriend I was good looking and that she was a lucky woman. She immediately took me home, shagged me vigorously, cried, and then broke up with me because, “It’s not you, it’s me.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331

You deserved it 202

Did you get your shots?

By It_gets_better - 02/12/2021 04:59

Today, my 75 year-old grandparents, who stubbornly refuse to be vaccinated, asked me to pick up their meds after they got COVID. I left work early to avoid the pharmacy line. After dropping them off, their pharmacy called: they didn't give me all of the meds, so I had to go back and wait another two hours in line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331

You deserved it 266

Can't take my eyes off you

By silverscrescent - 22/08/2020 02:02 - United Kingdom - Poole

Today, I was babysitting my 8-year-old niece. I left her for 10 minutes so I could take a shower, only to walk in on her with her dress rolled up, peeing on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331

You deserved it 465

Get better jokes

By nosy ass bitch! - 30/03/2022 16:00

Today, my classmate overheard me on the phone making an appointment at the women’s health center. The dumb bitch told everyone I was going to the clinic for STD treatment. I was scheduling my biopsy for a lump in my breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 108

There's a lot of them about

By Anonymous - 19/12/2021 05:01

Today, I went on a date with a guy who is perfect in every way, except for the tiny fact he thinks Covid is a hoax created by hospitals to profit massively on selling masks and hand sanitiser. Both my parents died from Covid and my nana is currently in hospital with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 234

Nice guy

By UnderAppreciated - 05/11/2021 23:00 - United States - Loveland

Today, after an entire week of doing all the household chores, and feeling under appreciated, I suggested to my boyfriend that we go on a date night, to feel a little more connected. He has spent all day trying to get out of it. I offered to pay, because I just want to feel loved again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 239

Emo teens

By Blanid - 22/05/2021 08:01

Today, my roommate’s 17 year-old daughter got broken up with. She locked herself in her room and won’t stop playing "Driver’s License" by Olivia Rodrigo on a continuous loop. Not to mention sounding like an agonizing cat while screaming its lyrics. It’s been 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 160

The punch from beyond the grave

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 14:00

Today, my brother‘s will read that everything would go to our other brother, so long as he punched me for having an affair with my his wife. So now I have a black eye. I’m gay, but I've never told my family. I didn't have an affair with his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 201

Red-handed

By Anonymous - 16/09/2022 23:30

Today, I fell over and obviously tried to grab the nearest object to stop myself. It was my boss's skirt, and both my head and the skirt hit the floor at the same time. I can now confirm my boss goes commando and is a natural redhead, and also I’m suspended pending a HR investigation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 372