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OP here, I didn't expect this to get posted so I made an account :) Your comments genuinely made me laugh! Since this got posted, here's some background for you: this happened to me two years ago, after I had worked for them for over a decade. While it wasn't the greatest job in the world, it felt like a calling to me. There's nothing I love more than making people (especially children) laugh. I later found out that they fired me because my boss wanted to impress his new girlfriend by giving her niece (who happens to be a chimp handler/animal trainer) a job. It was a small company and they couldn't afford to keep the both of us on, so I had to go :( But it's all good, I got lucky and found myself a similar job with better pay and benefits. :)

By ManagerWithoutRespect - 05/12/2016 05:14 - Canada - Saint Albert

Today, one of my co-workers threw a piece of garbage at the waste bin beside me. When it missed, he said, "Aw, I missed the garbage... and the bin beside it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 954

You deserved it 890

By Anonymous - 07/06/2017 21:00 - Italy

Today, at the request of my girlfriend, I took a ruler with me into the shower to measure myself. Later on, at the dinner table, my mom asked me, "so, how big is it?" I had forgotten to take the ruler out of the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 5 655

By Anonymous - 10/07/2017 21:00 - Argentina

Today, I celebrated my one year anniversary with my boyfriend. Since I'm bad at writing, I took a list from the internet titled "100 Things That I Love About You" and gave it to him to read while I read what he wrote for me. It was exactly the same thing, taken from the same page. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 700

You deserved it 6 869

By Umidknickname - 17/06/2017 16:00

Today, my boyfriend told me he was going away for the weekend to go clubbing with his mates. I would be fine with it, except the mates he's going with already tried to get him to cheat on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 939

You deserved it 501

By kill me - 20/06/2017 04:00

Today, while serving at my restaurant, a mother acted as a wing-woman for her son by insisting I read a note he'd written, asking for my number. I had to awkwardly reject the guy in front of his entire family, before having to keep serving them for another hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 056

You deserved it 515

By twicethepersonioncewas - 18/10/2016 05:19 - United States - Merion Station

Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification that my workload would be increased to more than twice what is was before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 359

You deserved it 983

Trolled by technology

By Rightswiper - 26/07/2017 05:00 - South Africa

Today, as soon as I put my card into an ATM, the words "Out of Order" popped up and it would not return my card. Since I was at the bank, I got a free replacement. Trying to draw money again the second machine did the same thing and a third card costs more than what I have in my account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 620

You deserved it 513

By not even - 21/07/2016 11:20 - United States - Troy

Today, my pregnant wife suggested we have fun tonight since we haven't had sex in three months. She also said we'll be having waffles and sausage. I'm actually more excited about the food than the sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 677

You deserved it 2 784

By Bedrest Blues - 24/12/2017 15:00

Today, my boyfriend told me that we can’t be together because I’m not the person he fell in love with since I don’t do anything all day. I’m 6 months pregnant and on bed rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 689

You deserved it 465

By Spider fail - 31/05/2016 19:06 - United States - East Lansing

Today, I had a dream that I was swinging through New York City as my favorite hero, Spider-Man. I was almost immediately beaten to death by a mugger. I suck even in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 747

You deserved it 1 098

By Anonymous - 25/05/2018 01:30

Today, my wife admitted that she purposefully starts fights with me purely because she enjoys arguing and seeing me flustered. Don't marry a lawyer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 192

You deserved it 597

By ERnightmare - 03/08/2018 06:00 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 136

You deserved it 4 326

By AnnaMuffin - 26/04/2016 22:08 - Netherlands - Leiden

Today, my mother showed me a picture of a dog in need of a home. Excitedly, I asked if we were getting it, having wanted one for a few months now. She said, 'No. I'm not even sure why I showed you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 062

You deserved it 1 049

AnnaMuffin tells us more.

AnnaMuffin 19

Thursday 12 May 2016 14:06

Hiya, I'm the OP. So this is a while ago already, but my mother knows how much I want a dog and then naively showed it to me. It's not like she was intentionally trying to be mean, she just wasn't really thinking. The reason I can't get a dog is because I'm 18, and only have 1 year of high school to go. I plan on moving to another country for my university, which would mean I'd have to take the dog through customs and everything, and then have him or her spend most of the time in a stuffy student room. It's far from ideal. Also they don't want to walk the dog, and we have three cats. I understand why we can't get a dog, but it still made me sad. As for my mom, she too loves dogs. She had two before she had me and my brothers, even. We get along well and I can confide in her a lot (mostly because I'm a loner(which is one of the reasons why I want the dog)). She's really not that bad, just forgetful sometimes. Hope this cleared it up!