Today, my boyfriend got upset that I wouldn't give him head. He was visiting me at the hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML
Today, I went to the emergency room with my boyfriend, only to sit there for 3 hours waiting for him to be seen, then having an argument with him about how impatient I am because they never called his name. FML
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, I went to the hospital due to extreme sickness. My boyfriend saw this as an opportune time to take another girl out since I was "otherwise preoccupied." FML
Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML
Today, my boyfriend crashed his car while I was giving him road head. FML
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Top comments
GrinchFu1 27
Do you work there, or did you just have your tonsils removed? There're different levels of inappropriateness...
squinch 16
Really? That's what you got out of this? "At least he visited you"? That's the least a decent human being can do, much less a boyfriend. Do you just have low standards or something?
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Comments (80)
sturschaedel 27
At least he visited you? But he really should be more considerate about you.
squinch 16
Really? That's what you got out of this? "At least he visited you"? That's the least a decent human being can do, much less a boyfriend. Do you just have low standards or something?
sturschaedel 27
In the past I had a boyfriend that refused to visit me because he hated hospitals. But no, even back then my standards weren't low enough to keep him around afterwards.
GrinchFu1 27
Do you work there, or did you just have your tonsils removed? There're different levels of inappropriateness...
PharmacyJoe 13
From the user name, looks like OP is there for medicine and not employment. :)
sturschaedel 27
Getting your tonsils removed is no joking matter. I you are really unlucky it might get you stuck in a rare "definitely-not-alive-yet-seemingly-not-dead-enough-to-get-you-buried-in-a-timely-manner" quantum state. (Don't know what I'm talking about? Go read Doc Bastard's blog!)
Algorithm 24
That's a weirdly flippant context to bring up that up in, 41. That being said, Doc has a pretty good blog.
Dave_Davington 35
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it would seem that you're dating a moron.
Ms_ValS 27
You should marry him OP. So that the next time you're in the hospital, if all goes well your next visit should be for delivery, he can visit you and ask you to make him a sandwich. I'll wait for your FML a couple of years down the road. I'm using sarcasm because I suspect people have already flat out told you to leave him. And clearly that didn't work.
brownapple 22
Wow what an idiot
amileah13 26
This just infuriates me. Here you are in the hospital for whatever reason and he's been selfish and wants head. Not a good boyfriend, I think it's time to reevaluate your relationship with him. I just hope it was a simple joke.
Arkajion 14
Sorry to say it, but this ever so hilarious joke is far from "simple".
FalloutScrolls 25
#6 I couldn't have said that any better. This would be one of those "you mean ex boyfriend" moments. What a self centered asshole.
jackipdoc 31
That's upsetting and inappropriate, so much disrespect on his part. You shouldn't have to deal with that
bhopejohnston 16
I'd say yes, then when he came over I'd punch him so hard in his "head" that he would be getting his own hospital bed.
Arkajion 14
Nothing says humanity like punching guys in the head (penis head applicable) in a damn hospitable. Atleast you were kind enough to have him il get immediate support, right?
Aimeejasmine 15
Nothing says humanity like prioritising your genitals over the life of your partner.
Mons_fml 27
come on baby lets get that cast off of your neck, yeeeeeeh! that's more like it.
MDoremis 38
I think this a first I've ever seen zero "you deserved it" votes, which OP doesn't. That's absolutely ridiculous and immature not to realize when that is appropriate and when it is not. (And yes, I know the voting is bound to change.)
hard_candy 25
even as a joke, it is absolutely unacceptable since the circumstances make it insensitive, inconsiderate and completely inappropriate. it would hurt my feelings severely, which is why I am assuming this is how OP feels as this is an FML. if he did only just want some action, dump him.