Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
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Top comments
idontknowyou123 0
y u no big enough
Nosrebor 8
Oh wow... Time to try again ;)
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Comments (423)
Nosrebor 8
Oh wow... Time to try again ;)
indielove 13
Mini-wanker definitely defines OP.
optimusprime0069 8
Milimeter peter?
FreshlyCut 0
Teeny weenie
YayFlameWarz 9
Small penis is small
SystemofaBlink41 27
You know what they say, it's the small things that matter...
ceilingfans 1
C C C COMBO BREAKER
indielove 13
30-no. . . just no
chuymac 3
Lucky, you can say you did a Virgin twice. haha
MaCOOLiT 5
U shouldve ask her to get her butthole checked if it was still a virgin.
castrosabeast 7
She lied to you!
Caramelox 3
The awkward moment when you couldn't do it right the first time.
JoshTheMaggot 8
Are you the one that got Mary pregnant?
tona01 16
Wrong hole
The_Troller 14
I guess OP came up short on this one
deadrising084 1
30-no one likes people like u-.-
MattRoseen 12
62- You're a legend.
BaconDave 12
That is a good sign that you don't pleasure her enough. Oh, and 128, your shirt fell off
narf887 4
This is one or those situations where the girl says it it in yet guy replies baby I'm already done ;)
Bravo11 14
You must be God.
Jammy01jams 2
I'm going to guess that this is due to lack of cherry pop? Well in that case it's not uncommon to not pop the cherry the first time. I there is actually no physical evidence of a penis bein in there then that is so small that no amount of "it's how you use it that counts" will save you.
jacquay09 3
Yes. Just well done sir
Georgieeporgiee 9
You can pop your cherry dancing or horse riding... What kinda doctor did she go to?
MetallicaRules19 4
Sausage down a hallway.
Adman567 9
Hahaha 53 truer words hav never been spoken
v1kt4r 13
She was a virgin before she became a vampire, virgin for ever
KELSEYJOHNSON23 5
Who goes to the doctor just because they had sex for the first time anyway?
goomonk 2
Your shirt fell off
itsame0987 18
Glad I scrolled down 88.. I thought the same thing when I read this fml.. That does kinda suck op, but on a happy note this is now in my favorites.
Choose_Wisely 5
79 - op is god O.O
SockMonkey333 0
Omfg your stupid
43trauts 14
#278 is oddly win
Humanspider 18
I love the trueblood reference #283
linarahmany 6
lol
wastingtimeonFML 7
This is hilarious!
idontknowyou123 0
y u no big enough
m0tl3ycru3 0
Roids?
Sonic_boomerang 5
Genetics?
haw008 14
37 that is way more than I ever wanted to know... This is FML not tell people how long it took to pop your cherry.
EvilPotato 15
57 this is an FML about having sex, and your flipping over someone talking about how long it took to pop someones cherry, in fact there was an FML about how someone kicked a girl in the crouch, and it popped her cherry, if you can't stand talking about sexuality then GTFO.
haw008 14
Your name should be hotpotato because you get so damn mad over the stupidest stuff!
EvilPotato 15
96 you annoy me, only stupid people annoy me, your name should be "iAngerPeople", I only do long comments for stupid people. And if you read your comment over you're saying your own comment is stupid. So STFU before I call KaySL to come beat your ass.
Valdrek 26
Your the one who read the comment.
KiddNYC1O 22
Y I rich and u poor? >.
Valdrek 26
66- she wasn't speaking for the rest of us folk who very much wanted to hear more detail about your cherry popping saga. You now have the stage.
haw008 14
I'm sorry all I can do is laugh at this point. Back to more important things now. Oh and please add me to your most hated list. I'd love that :)
CleverBastard 8
Oh god she has such a huge head but nothing inside of it, it's like she got shot off of a stupid planet, hit a stupid tree, and hit every ******* branch on the way down.
EvilPotato 15
129 you've convinced me to add you to my shit list, see kids this is why you stay in school so you don't end up this this loser.
haw008 14
Too bad I'm in college, on the honor's list but you would only assume I wasn't because you are a stuck up prick going through a mid life crisis with nothing better to do than play on the Internet all day calling other people "losers" because you are one yourself and it makes you feel a little less unimportant. So I'm done with this conversation. But thank you for adding me!
haw008 14
And whoever has anime *cough* 168 as there picture. Definitely has never had sex.
horserider15 3
You should chill out she didnt go into horrid detail
_Oblivion_ 12
170 is mad
haw008 14
Not mad just procrastinating. I really do not wanna read this book! And people that take things to seriously amuse me.
EvilPotato 15
166 are you on the honors list for extreme stupidity? Or are you just on your period? Or are you a bitch? I honestly don't know, you have me dumbfounded. Now stop commenting before I start raging.
Docbee 11
170, didn't you say you left a while ago? Now that I see you are still here, I fear for my health as your mental retardation is so immaculate(sp?) that it chokes the air and IQ around you. Do not bother calling me a "fail" as that is the level of your intelligent comebacks. I'll only politely respond with "so was your mom's abortion.":) Anime is awesome=P
haw008 14
Please go raging!!!
CleverBastard 8
You said you were going to leave like 3 comments ago yet you keep arguing? When you act like a bitchy dumbass, just leave. Some people need to learn to not give a ****.
haw008 14
Kinda like you? I see you're still commenting.
_Oblivion_ 12
Bitch its like 50 to 1 against you. Quit bitching and quit being an immature brat. Your parents must have been reallllly stupid to send you to collage, because right now all we see is some prick trying to start shit and doesnt know when to stfu.
CleverBastard 8
My point exactly. I never said I was going to stop commenting and do "better things with my time" and bitch and moan about stupid shit. People like you give me no faith in humanity.
_Oblivion_ 12
^ remove please? along with this too
haw008 14
And you were obviously to stupid to get into college because you can't even spell it
CleverBastard 8
*too. Lord help us all.
EvilPotato 15
188 but he didn't say he would stop commenting, I don't know how you made it into college your IQ is PU, I could say plenty colorful words but would probably get moderated and banned, so I'll hold back, but you are clearly losing this thread war, so please leave...NOW.
_Oblivion_ 12
yeah I went at 16 graduated yesterday. You know backing up your shit really helps.
EvilPotato 15
No more comments :(.
xXSillyLoveXx 0
This goes great with #1s picture :')
Nosrebor 8
Hahaha I didn't notice that before
careless92 5
You know what they say about small penises........oh, nvm.
somerandomdude19 2
Challenge excepted
yoimtrollin 24
*accepted
xXMrTXx 0
Ur a fag get off FMl.
NEEPLES 7
I noticed that too lol.
idontknowyou123 0
I was inspired by.number 1s pic.
GoingCommando93 14
You got small feet, bro.
musicphreakk 0
TROLLOLOLOLOL... ;D
skullcandifiedDJ 5
ouch... there goes your manhood >_>
sarcasm17 10
Some guys just aren't big enough...
yellowstar808 6
Some girls just aren't pretty enough either
gleniatorixx 5
Well that's mean.
yellowstar808 6
Now she knows how op feels saying some guys aren't big enough
YayFlameWarz 9
21- and some girls are bitches
yellowstar808 6
Got that right;)
bannedforlife 0
Don't worry. You can work on getting your IQ above 60 and then maybe you'll be "smart enough."
yellowstar808 6
And who are u talking to?
CarleeBugg123 5
Lol. Biotch got pwned!
number0 8
If your IQ were above 60, maybe you'd know...
J0gby 0
yellowstar is in denial about his own size...
LiveLaughFML 10
lol pretty sure yellowstar is a female
eaglesfootball 1
52 I'm sorry but that is the most random comment I have ever read
11jackson11 0
21 is a badass
happyabby123 0
21-39 got u there..lolXD
amayasoma 19
Pretty sure 52 was talking to 21.
bebohacker1 4
21- it's okay, I thought you had a funny point. If your gonna insult someone's "size" you'd think you'd be pretty enough to have seen one first... Ain't that right no.3?
McGherkin 0
Because 3 did not use a meme.
DHoffmann 9
Meh, we could tell 3 was kidding around. He also used 1's profile pic meme which was pretty clever :)
yellowstar808 6
Nah I wasn't picking on anyone blondie I was just making a point on how someone can pick on someone who picked on someone else. U also proved my point. ;) I don't understand how some girls can insult a guys dick size when I'm pretty sure the girl has a flaw too. No one ain't perfect. ;)
ciscmowe 5
270 - Youre not making a point. you're just being a hypocrite by doing what 3 did.
Freeze_fml 17
She made a point. Not nicely, but the idea was conveyed regardless. As did the responses to her.
pablo1206 5
Ugly girls can still get dick though, guys tap anything that moves and have a hole
MommaMuff 6
"No one ain't perfect." Because that makes sense.
ppatty 0
dam lol
idontknowyou123 0
#21. Your grammar sucks. Go back to school. As for your post, id hit that (@#3), cause beauty is more than skin deep bitch
VicmahnFml 0
Ho
Daralea 21
Just be sure you have a big enough dick for her, 297.
mspeacock 6
And some girls don't rely on just their looks, they have that thing called "a personality". Who cares what she looks like, we all look gross when we're 80.
idontknowyou123 0
#315 I have a story about my penis. But its a long one...
himynameiskrista 0
Yellowstar- Bitches like you should stay in their little whorehouses & not be allowed to see the light of day. And at least that chick you were raggin' on isn't a fake lookin little **** like you.
caysters 12
I learned I was still physically a virgin after a year and a half with my ex... FYL dude.
psychobiker08 4
Sounds like hes got a needle dick! FHL
jewelsa 4
Damn 0.0
jewelsa 4
Damn 0.0
stephan18 23
Damn!
BaconDave 12
Dayum
CleverBastard 8
Damn 0.0
KingGeorgeGal 12
Oh damnnnnnn!
josebeto1 6
....... Damn..
Epsilonyx 15
Anal.
curlyfry33 8
Um...u have your profile picture of your baby...whatever physical virginty u had got violently ripped appart during the horrifing beauty of birth.
soapbar 0
daaayum
caysters 12
Baby is my nephew. lol
clumsylittleme 11
Why they hell are all the comments on this "D amn"...?
Biebz4Lyf10 0
haha everyone put thumbs down to every reply :L
screamo_neve 12
Fuuuck.
yourlifeisbetter_fml 0
You never mentioned having sex with your ex...
PeypeyTheBeeotch 1
That's not what the baby in your picture says!!
cradle6 13
Your name is hilarious
nothingtodisplay 7
At least he's truthful about his dick size.
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
OP that's when u sing "I just had sex"
Kennzz 0
But I doubt it felt good.
LiveLaughFML 10
at least a woman let him put his penis inside of her -__-/
VaanBasch 1
But you gotta wonder if it was truly "inside". Doesn't seem like it.
False_Stupidity 42
And OP's g/f can start singing 'like a virgin'
cradle6 13
Double post
That0therguy 4
That never works, incase you haddnt noticed
That0therguy 4
That never works, incase you haddnt noticed
SystemofaBlink41 27
I didn't...
knockasauras 0
Fyl chinese ppl
Decapitation 3
That just sounds like a small problem.
lovelylittleme 0
Cooooorrrrnnnyyyy.. Haha
gleniatorixx 5
That's a joke but it really happened...
ninjuh_wingman 29
Hey at least you got laid
nerdfighteria 7
Doesn't matter, had sex!
nerdfighteria 7
Crap, double post . . . Sorry.
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
75- lol "Just Had Sex" feat. Akon
LiveLaughFML 10
#89: I just had sexxxxx and it felt so good! a woman let me put my peeenis inside of her yeahh
redfishbluefish2 13
Still counts!
FUUUandyourmom 16
I'd just like to point out that, at this current moment, you have 69 likes. That is all.