By Anonymous - 23/07/2010 00:39 - United Kingdom

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 817
You deserved it 16 845

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

tehslack 5

Haha, moronic.

Hahahaha way to go mc lovin !


tehslack 5

Haha, moronic.

Hahahaha way to go mc lovin !

thatguy888 0

you said the same thing twice

Sounds like it's gonna be a start of a porn movie

anlhawks 5

youuuuu dummmmmmy lol Ü

I feel bad for the nurse. lol but fyl:p

xFalzz 0

Lol @ #13. My thoughts exactly

the_flirtt 0

ya but hey atleast you don't need male enhancement

abcdefghijKayla 0

smooth. very smooth.

for all you know she could be turned on as well ;D

the_flirtt 0

I doubt it 24

did she say "i can see why"

theoriginalfake 2

are u the devil?

27 would you say the same thing if it was you?

well you never know

the_flirtt 0

hah of course not why would you ask that ? you curious *_*

ydi for not herping a derp

This sort of situation is the one were you look back at it and you want to face-palm every time

#35 is one BAMF.

the_flirtt 0

hah ya no

Arsonnist 3

I bet sleep feels special.

Arsonnist 3

she*. Wow, I guess I need some sleep.

13 - YOU WOULD KNOW!! lol

hellokittywhore 0

nurse: well let's change that shall we? *shoves he roughly on table.* chessy porn music starts playing. btw # 60 your cutee ;D

Fyl for having a lump. I hope it's not too serious.

LeighMoreno 0

Ignorance, shhh.. Let them learn. :P

hellokittywhore 0

it probably isn't him but whomever it is is cutee. I hate it when people font have pictures of themselves as their profile pic. or a car!!! that really bugs

Or you just be like me and post a smoking hot picture of yourself I know you're all jealous

LeighMoreno 0

Biancaaaa Shut your face. :D

hellokittywhore 0

the only thing hot in your profile pic is the fire on the background. XD

#90 just nailed a slam dunk.

Generalx3 0

Teehee. This made me laugh. you need to get laid. xD

YourEvilHero 12

least it didn't happen with a male nurse

TwoStrikeBadAss 0

35 Everyone knows it doesn't count if you have to pay for it stop Bragging like your tough sh*t because you aren't sorry!

BananaSticker 0

Well at least she knows you aren't gay? Here's a banana sticker to cheer you up OP. :]

should have just apologised to the nurse and got on with it...they're trained to deal with the human body and be emotionally detached. should have thought more on what to say:P

35 I laughed harder at your posturing over being some pseudo-stud than I did at this FML! Thanks dude!

lol op, smooth, just....smooth.

vballerlover07 0

Don't think about to much, OP. That nurse has more than likely seen worse or has had men get erections during exams. Don't be to hard on yourself.

cantfightfate 0

reminds me friends when Ross tries to kiss his cousin. "I haven't had sex in a really long time." hahaha

cantfightfate 0

reminds me OF friends*

elizzcbs13 0

hahahahaha one of the many reasons I'm glad I'm a girl! that's embarassing. but I'm sure the nurse figured it was gonna happen.

ImsoMikhail 0

obviosly they didn't fuck because if they had he wouldn't have been posting this as a fml

MarkerofMagic 0

hahaha #90 that was great.

31 wins five internets.

White_Fury 0

90 is a winner! haha

stewpididiot 11

huhuughuh .. you said hard on... huhuughuh.

Boygenius50 8


dudeitsdanny 9

35 hasn't learned that masturbating to his Barbies isn't considered sex. I love when kids pretend to be badass. OP- Consider her line of work. You're not her first erection, and won't be her last. You probably made it more awkward by talking about it, lol.

sexisbad 1

lol nice pun

knight0748 5

shoulda tell her this is how you imagine you would lose you virginity...

lucky for you, #84, my pic really IS me. Do you like what you see?

The funny thing about #90 is that that was the whole point of putting "smoking hot" in there was because I had a torch in it >.>

$10 says 35 is a virgin.

mush_room 0

You guys are funny :) I haven't put a picture up because I'm afraid a friend might recognize me on FML and it's fun to be anonymous. lol And op, idk why that would even come out of your mouth. lol I would of just said "well that's embarrassing" u_u or nothing at all. :P

nateb1tch 1

i hate the random boners that screw with us.. and hopefully it wasnt your full time dr or that would be awkward forever

Then she looks up at you and seductively says, "Well we can fix that. I know how to get rid of one of these lumps." That's from a porn movie.

Troll_Hater 0

35 is fuck face

normally doesn't the doctor do the medical examinations?

Bow Chicka Wah wah!

brown chicken brown cow!

are your arms like really short, is that why ???

oh dangggggg, haha fml is harsh these days.

35, baller statusssss!

mynewaccount 8


hahaha @132, exactly what I was thinking!!

mellovesyuh 0

#96 u look like u needd too get layed too so don't talkk KONICHIWA ;)

chuk_norris_fml 0

If you ask me it's more of an FML that you have a lump on your crotch than some hot chick who touched your shlong Sounds like you got lucky on that one

joemk2012 0

Ha! I get it! "Hard" on yourself!

astarwarsfan 0

did she prescribe Viagra afterwards? xD

sexycourtcourt 0

dude that's sucks ass!! I feel bad for that nurse....

BAMFs are cool kids x)

cbdee 8

So true!!!

lol yeah that's pretty dumb

Hahahaha way to go mc lovin !

PurplePigeon 0

if that's your smartest, I would hate to hear, the dumb things you say.

it's called sarcasm.

PurplePigeon 0


anlhawks 5

niccceee lol way to go shoulda said well your hot and maybe you coulda got some digits ;)

Just stop. You're retarded.

too_dopee 0

i dont see how thats the smartest thing to sayy.

hellokittywhore 0

omg!!! I love your hello kitty!!!!!!!!

brycereid 0


too_dopee 0

you're gay and thanks(:

Yung23 0

lmao loser!! u should have said I think it needs ah treatment bahaha

#7's name says it all. :/

LeighMoreno 0

So, #7.. When do you plan on changing that pic? :P

Do you not know what happened this summer in the NBA? Your name explains :P

Must have been the story of the year. Too bad basketball is boring.

LeighMoreno 0

Lol, Loren. Freeze, basketball is pretty awesome. :P What sport(s) do you watch then?

Freeze Freeze! How dare you make a joke out of someones username! Disgraceful Anyways, Basketball has more stuff going on than Football so I'm stuck with waiting for Favre to say he's coming back and LeBron going to Miami, but otherwise idc about it

did you poke her eye?

Giggity giggity, giggity goo!

hahaFYL458 0