Today, my wife allowed my mother-in-law to move in with us. She believes the government spies on her in the shower, and that the Prime Minister is a shape-shifting lizard who wants to microchip us all. I have to live with this psychotic wench until someone is desperate enough to employ her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother-in-law moved into my wife's two-bedroom apartment. She's quite possibly the reincarnation of Hitler himself, and she'll be staying until this time next year. FML
Today, my mother-in-law moved in with my husband and I, where she shits the bed and herself. There's a waiting list for the nursing home, so in the meantime I’m cleaning up her shit and she isn’t even my mother. FML
Today, I found out that my unemployed and very needy mother-in-law will be moving in with us soon. And during my conversation on the phone with her, she expects us to buy a house and my wife and I can "live with her." My wife agrees with all of this. FML
Today, my mother-in-maw informed us that she sold her house and is moving in with us so we'll "take care" of her in old age. She's in perfect health. We've only been married for 4 months. My wife can't stand her for more than 2 weeks at a time, let alone living with us. FML
Today, my mother-in-law asked if she could move in with us. FML
Today, my husband told me that he's letting his mother move in with us. He told her it was alright without even consulting me first. I hate my mother-in-law so much that I'm contemplating divorce rather than living with her. FML
Today, I came home from a week-long vacation, only to find my mother-in-law didn't just dog-sit while I was gone; she moved in, along with all her possessions, and seems to think it's a permanent deal. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, my psycho sister came home. Why did she leave? To manipulate my parents to let her live here rent free. My mother built her a new bedroom, twice the size of my unit, so she can fuck my ex with privacy. She earns 4 times what I do, but doesn't have to pay rent. I own the house with mum. FML
Today, my flatmate moved in with me. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to me, so did her mother. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
xrainbowshadowx 17
Stick one of the toy lizards on the shower wall.
SuperKnuckels 6
i thought most politicians are shape shifting lizards.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (210)
Anavrin9 2
The reptilians, man. You'd better not underestimate them.
lauraaaaaa_fml 7
I think the shower is one of the very few place the government doesn't spy on people...and I'd say Cameron's more of a snake than a lizard. But other than that, it sounds like your mother-in-law has got this pretty spot-on. Maybe you're the psychotic one for not believing her...?
reddudeover 2
Replace "my wife" with we and "I have to" with "I'm gonna". Marriage is an equal partnership you had a say in this, unless you're completely dickless.
ElricMustang 23
I feel sorry for your wife more than you...
bulldoghitman97 4
No, Im pretty sure the wife has lived with her crazy ass mother and is use to it. The husband doesn't know and doesn't deserve it. I say put her in homeless shelter. There's lots of other crazies she can conspire with there!
calilovergirl 4
I think you should just make her convinced you turn into a vampire or something at night so she's too scared to stay. But then again she might try and kill you.
Vega4628 2
She sounds nice :)
lady1992 5
Gotta love them in-laws lmfao ... Wow
perdix 31
Get her a job with the local vet microchipping lizards. She might meet the Prime Minister!
iamyourgod 3
How do you even get a blue shell in first place? Did you hold on to it and somehow pass all 11 other Karts with no power up usage?
stormchaser24 24
Well, the government spying is true. And maybe the microchip thing. All else I don't think so. FYL having to live with a crazy person.