Today, my wife allowed my mother-in-law to move in with us. She believes the government spies on her in the shower, and that the Prime Minister is a shape-shifting lizard who wants to microchip us all. I have to live with this psychotic wench until someone is desperate enough to employ her. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mother-in-law moved into my wife's two-bedroom apartment. She's quite possibly the reincarnation of Hitler himself, and she'll be staying until this time next year. FML
Today, my mother-in-law moved in with my husband and I, where she shits the bed and herself. There's a waiting list for the nursing home, so in the meantime I’m cleaning up her shit and she isn’t even my mother. FML
Today, I found out that my unemployed and very needy mother-in-law will be moving in with us soon. And during my conversation on the phone with her, she expects us to buy a house and my wife and I can "live with her." My wife agrees with all of this. FML
Today, my mother-in-maw informed us that she sold her house and is moving in with us so we'll "take care" of her in old age. She's in perfect health. We've only been married for 4 months. My wife can't stand her for more than 2 weeks at a time, let alone living with us. FML
Today, my mother-in-law asked if she could move in with us. FML
Today, my husband told me that he's letting his mother move in with us. He told her it was alright without even consulting me first. I hate my mother-in-law so much that I'm contemplating divorce rather than living with her. FML
Today, I came home from a week-long vacation, only to find my mother-in-law didn't just dog-sit while I was gone; she moved in, along with all her possessions, and seems to think it's a permanent deal. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, my psycho sister came home. Why did she leave? To manipulate my parents to let her live here rent free. My mother built her a new bedroom, twice the size of my unit, so she can fuck my ex with privacy. She earns 4 times what I do, but doesn't have to pay rent. I own the house with mum. FML
Today, my flatmate moved in with me. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to me, so did her mother. FML
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Top comments
xrainbowshadowx 17
Stick one of the toy lizards on the shower wall.
SuperKnuckels 6
i thought most politicians are shape shifting lizards.
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Comments (210)
AwsumShyGuy 12
Please tell me you've played Mario Kart before.
Devin91 20
Good ******* luck.
bulldoghitman97 4
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA! SAME HERE BRO!
eccentrix 12
Martha Mooner?
FarscapeSDC 9
The government spying on her in the shower and microchips stuff is crazy. But I don't know about David Cameron; given his policies of systematically screwing over everyone, who's to say he isn't an Evil lizard? Who votes we take 70% of all the politicians salaries and invest it into finding a way to bring Winston Churchill back to life? He can lead us while we fight Cameron and his army of Lizard-men.
redsfan 4
What if she's right?
dunicha 20
To be fair, I've always found Cameron to be a little reptilian myself.
thiscrazything 1
Just make her think you are crazier than her, and will finish her off in her sleep........ It may be evil, but she will leave. You win!
Z33F 2
Genius...is ur wife at least amazing
valwojazz 11
There's some half truths in that.
redmnky21 8
someones been watching too much doctor who