Intimacy: Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by...

By verysadasian - 30/07/2009 14:21 - United States

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 623

You deserved it 29 260

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Stereotypes

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 09:42 - United States

Today, my friends and I noticed that people, no matter what stereotype, pretty much all have the same type of friends: the mean one, the funny one, etc., and started naming off the people in our group who fit into those personalities. We got to the token fat one, everyone looked at me and stopped talking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 023

You deserved it 10 379

By spandex - 24/03/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I had to perform a skit in my class in which I have to wear tight spandex compression shorts. The class laughed pretty hard, and I felt like I had done a good job. Afterward, a girl I have a crush on said, "So the stereotype about Asian guys IS true." Through the fluorescent lights you could see my junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 437

You deserved it 11 916

By lilben - 10/06/2011 08:09 - United States

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 590

You deserved it 4 781

By NiHao - 28/09/2009 03:16 - Canada

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 128

You deserved it 3 878

By oh my son - 23/12/2012 06:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 738

You deserved it 5 763

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 16:17 - Canada

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 644

You deserved it 11 270

By Noname - 11/03/2009 20:29 - United States

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 982

You deserved it 9 595

"shortcomings"

By Anonymous - 24/02/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 908

You deserved it 633

By me - 09/08/2011 03:43 - United States

Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 414

You deserved it 7 356

That one friend

By meesa in big doo do dis time! - 13/06/2017 12:00

Today, I learned that all of my "friends" refer to me as the, "Jar Jar Binks" of our circle of friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 522

You deserved it 467

Butterbuns 1

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:12

....Wow. YDI, for being lame enough to BE comparing dick sizes with your friends. Do you not have anything better to do?

henri_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:10

didn't you know the size of your own dick before you entered a measuring contest?

Comments

Njord09 2

Friday 31 July 2009 21:53

aw thats a pitty, but hey you might have a better chance of getting anal than your friends. i mean being the top, since you are all gays for doing it :). You go girl, get those asses !

Osprey 0

Friday 31 July 2009 22:19

Well now you can label your group of friends "gay".

Tommy_Trust 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 10:05

Uhm... I guess I would be sort of an expert on the subject, but gay guys are pretty phobic about showing the goods to other gay guys. In my experience, straight guys are surprisingly ready to grab eachothers' asses, stick their junk on a drunk dude's face and take pictures... Side note- http://www.salon.com/health/sex/urge/world/1999/11/04/size/ Yea.. it's true.

veritaserum 0

Friday 31 July 2009 22:21

Wait.. Guys ACTUALLY do that ? =0

amstillives 0

Friday 31 July 2009 23:45

That's gay shit. How does your small dick become hard. Are there guys that turn you on. Typical asian.

hsumalachi 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 1:01

generally asian girls have small v. so an asian guy kinda has to be small too. but unless you look at every asian guy size, then how would you know most asians are small? i'm asian and i'm big. but it's not really a good thing anyways since most women can only take 6 inches before you hit their wall.

NonchalantSavant 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 1:50

You were great in "The Hangover!"

AssOf2009 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 7:18

YDI for being retarded and weird. Who does that?

dspadres 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 8:04

You know, when people say "dick measuring contest" they don't mean that literally. What the **** is wrong with you?

eeee93757 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 8:55

So wait...you guys pulled your dicks out in front of each other? And managed to "get it up" while having nothing to look at but your friends' dicks? ROTFL you queer *****.