Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend, whom I haven't heard from in a whole month,...

By howaboutno - 14/03/2013 09:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend, whom I haven't heard from in a whole month, turned up at my door because it was apparently "steak and blowjob day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 464

You deserved it 8 674

Intimacy

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your_ma 27

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:42

Eh how is he still your boyfriend anyway when you haven't seen or heard from him in a month?!

TeamKelly 10

Thursday 14 March 2013 16:40

Time for a new boyfriend...

TeamKelly 10

Thursday 14 March 2013 16:40

Time for a new boyfriend...

courtney680 17

Thursday 14 March 2013 17:08

Why is she even still dating him to begin with? He sounds like an ass and she hadn't seen her in a month.

ParadoxicalPea 8

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Thursday 14 March 2013 17:24

I agree with 25. How do you date someone you haven't heard from in a month?

OuchAndGoodfight 5

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Thursday 14 March 2013 17:48

Nope, it's steak and blowjob time.

S182 15

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Thursday 14 March 2013 20:41

25 & 33: Well... In my case, I sometimes have to goto the field and train for a month at a time... I have yet to have someone break up with me because of it. Also, March 14 is literally steak and blowjob day.

Diesel_baby 18

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Thursday 14 March 2013 23:45

My boyfriend and I met in college and leave across country from each other. But he at least still talks to me!

J_C_maldonado 9

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Friday 15 March 2013 4:26

I would Say coffee break more like it he wants to leave you for a month no sex for him for 2 months.

9lashes 15

Friday 15 March 2013 6:10

-81 if he was gone for training i dont think this would be an FML

yeti37 16

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Friday 15 March 2013 20:01

Tell him since you didn't hear from him in a month, you have his gift to someone else.

DocBastard 38

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:41

It is? Why wasn't I told??! I've already had steak today, so...

porcupineattack1 5

Thursday 14 March 2013 16:51

I thought it was pie day. Gotta get down on pie day.

ParadoxicalPea 8

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Thursday 14 March 2013 17:26

I don't have any steak in the house. :( Does this mean I have to double up on the BJ?

pmadNess 14

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Thursday 14 March 2013 17:59

34- Yup

TeddyB88 4

Thursday 14 March 2013 18:17

If you don't have steak then you triple on the bj. Everyone knows feb. 14 is for women and march 14 is the men's equivalent. Mark your damn calendars people

ParadoxicalPea 8

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Thursday 14 March 2013 18:20

53, we didn't do anything special Feb 14th. It was a mutual agreement. So I guess I'm off the hook. :O

TeddyB88 4

Thursday 14 March 2013 18:27

Well sucks for him lmao. Maybe next year hell plan something

ParadoxicalPea 8

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Thursday 14 March 2013 18:44

59, hey, I think I read about that recently!

lambda_fml 40

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Thursday 14 March 2013 20:34

#65 me too! Just a couple comments above infact.

laden_swallow09 34

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Friday 15 March 2013 0:07

16- It's Pi Day! Pi! 3.14! March the fourteenth! I don't know how to make the pi symbol on my iPhone…

your_ma 27

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:42

Eh how is he still your boyfriend anyway when you haven't seen or heard from him in a month?!

natsaysheyyy 16

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Friday 15 March 2013 7:59

Sounds like it was "dump the asshole" day about three weeks ago. If he's not communicating with you at all after a few days, pretty sure he doesn't give a fuck.

HarrisonVR 17

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:43

what a dick, should have grilled him

rattusrattus 18

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:43

Well. He sounds like someone who truly cares about you.

SirCharles83 13

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:44

Why is your user name "howaboutno"? What's the matter, you don't like steak?

anonymouss21_fml 4

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Thursday 14 March 2013 17:07

"give me a blowjob?" "howaboutno."

Incredidanny 5

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Thursday 14 March 2013 18:05

He was being sarcastic..

Zomg_Okay 26

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Thursday 14 March 2013 18:19

No, he wasn't. He was making a joke.

SirCharles83 13

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Thursday 14 March 2013 18:58

24- idiot. 45- no. 55- Winning.

euphoricness 28

Thursday 14 March 2013 23:51

69 - I am sure we are all capable of determining what is not fail or what is sarcastic ourselves.

SirCharles83 13

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Friday 15 March 2013 0:20

Tell that to 24 and 45

ry24 12

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:45

And you're still with this guy!?

perdix 29

Thursday 14 March 2013 16:46

He was probably still smarting from the expense of Valentime's Day! Tell him it is also Pi Day -- you two can go round and round arguing about that! If he's not interested in your pi, but wants the BJ, remind him that today is the 69th day of the year (*actually, you are off by a few, but close enough!)

SeepingSarcasm 7

Thursday 14 March 2013 17:21

Not interested in his girlfriends pi?? That would be reason enough for him not to be allowed to celebrate this special day, and be made to eat veggies and watch Snooki and friends on a 24 hour loop broadcast while the rest of us keep todays tradition strong!

greenie213 23

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Thursday 14 March 2013 16:47

Tell him it's Take a Hike Day. Then make YOURSELF a steak.

DanielleinDC 32

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Thursday 14 March 2013 19:24

Unless she's vegetarian. Then she can make herself a tofu steak. This is really unfair to veg couples, you know. But I will be cooking my boyfriend dinner before we watch a hockey game. But yeah, tell him to take a hike if he's going to disappear for a month like that.