Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
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Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Well, clearly he brought you there to show you the importance of personal hygiene.
kahaari 0
three words? clean. your. vag.
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Comments (309)
lich_fml 0
i kinda think he was kidding. my boyfriend..er..ex.. boyfriend used to do that stuff to me all the time.
thatwasobvious 0
ok maybe your not all familiar with how vaginas smell. thats not THAT rare of a comparison. grow the **** up. oh, and 23, i do think you are kidding. nobody could possibly be that dumb unintentionally
omigod 0
F your va-jay-jay. next time use some bleach down there
ArmyOfOne 0
Damn, you fools are getting trolled so hard. Nice one andersoniii...
bombastic117 0
wow, this might have been one of the funniest things I've read in a looong time....lol
chea_chea 0
He was probably just making a joke..a pretty low one, but still, he wouldnt have used that tone of voice if he was serious. Speaking of serious, do so many people actually think that janderson is serious? 6.1 trillion women are murdered every second? There aren't even close to 1 trillion on the planet, nevermind 6, She/he is just ******* with everybody and they're taking the bait. LMAO this is too funny
UncleverName_FYL 0
puregold FTW!!! ....ive never LOL so hard in my life @#111 jandersoniii ooo im so sorry that females have go through childbirth. If only we males didn’t have male reproductive organs, but instead had eggs cells, uterus, and a ******. Then maybe we could have babies and take all of that unwanted sex and 10 million a second rape from women. Jandersoniii i must say I really feel sorry for the male (a.k.a. " RAPISTS OR POTENTIAL RAPISTS" cause he could have been a sperm donor) who wasted his sperm on you.
NuclearWinter 0
^ And that, my friends, is a troll.
Eriallday69 0
I love fish ! Can i plz eaat u out ! ?
ReadaBook 0
jandersoniii, I feel it necessary to oppose our views simply because they are so extreme and fail to take empirical evidence into account to the extent it should be. Aparently the male half of the animal kingdom has initiated a massive coup since the evolution of sexual reproduction. I'm sure that when Dragonflies are mating they are deliberately asserting their personal ideas of male dominance over the female dragonflies. Furthermore I would like to state that the answer to your statement of having 50% of the male population bear children is solved by the random determination of gender that occurs as a result of fertilization. Sorry but you're sorted at birth by nature there is no need for human interference. You justify making an unnatural occurence in order to counter the social development of male dominance rather than having society fall back to nature. As far as the pain of childbirth, I will never expierience it, but it is not necessarily caused by a male's penetration as seen in in vitro fertilization. Besides those points, yeah, I do believe that abuse is not one of the better facets of society. In terms of procreation your going to need men just as men need women, but as far as raising the children men should take a strong role and support their partner. I mean come on, male sea horses can do it why can't humans. On a less academic note, sure go make a community based on your beliefs. Lets see how long it lasts. p.s. - sorry to those who come to this site for laughs