Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home drunk from town, busted the toilet door open crying, and proposed to me with a ring and all. I was literally mid-shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend taking a dump in the litter box. He said he wanted to know what it felt like for the cat. FML
Today, I came home early to surprise my boyfriend. I walked into our bedroom to find him in dressed completely in my clothes, and in makeup. It took me a moment to realize it was him and not a female intruder. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend peeing in the cat's litter box. I'm the one who has to clean it out. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML
Today, my boyfriend took our dog to the vet because he heard him whining in pain this morning. It was actually me singing in the shower. FML
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Top comments
lightanddark 17
What did you sing to your cat?
ironichalibut 24
Prolly want a cracker?
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Comments (101)
shady_fox77 13
It depends whether or not you're a good singer...
Dodge4x4Ram 46
this isn't funny meow
Axipiter 24
Not so funny meow, is it?
warsun 27
Why would it be funny?
vuduguru 5
Alright meow, what's so damn funny?
VitalDistance 14
Wait so you left the door to the bathroom open? O.O
xNephilim 19
I do when I'm alone at home. Doors are for privacy and I don't think my washing machine cares if it sees me take a crap.
sirsquab 12
I consider bathroom doors to have a secondary function of quarantining the smell of poop
Spyderbane 10
24 - what if your significant other comes home early and finds you in the bathroom singing to your cat while your taking a crap?
cryssycakesx3 23
I don't think this is a huge deal. I never shut the door. gets a little awkward at other's houses though... /s
SnazzyPotter 17
Did he drunkenly profess his love for you too?
abzray123 7
Wasn't your cat scared? :/
Steve95401 49
Singing to your cat while your car took a crap might be even more weird.
name_loading 19
Did he turn it into a duet?
Enslaved 38
Surprised the shit out of you?
konstantinos616 17
It was probably already gone by then.
disabledhuman 2
Who the **** cares? If your bf can't accept that you sing to your cat while leaving a poop alone he doesn't deserve someone as unique as yourself.
xNephilim 19
Exactly. And seriously, we all do silly things like that. And the whole bathroom thing... Get over it, because there WILL be a day when you're on the toilet, out of TP, and it's all the way in the kitchen with the rest of the groceries you have yet to unpack.
CoolCookie210 22
I thought you were going to say he walked in on you cheating. This is much preferable!