Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML
Today, my boyfriend's dream came true; he had always wanted to break a bed during sex. The bed he broke was a heirloom in my family for 150 years. The best part? He was by himself. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I was up late and heard my mother and her boyfriend come home. After a full minute of bed-creaking action, I heard him exclaim, "I did it! A new record, haha!" I can't get it out of my head. FML
Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML
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Top comments
Mercedes16 7
At least he broke the record. Lol
iamabamf 17
Doesn't matter, had sex.
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Comments (218)
emeraldisle 30
Eh he's trying. Give the guy a break.
Eddie465 0
Hey hows it going
Jazzyman9182 0
Was it the best 2 minutes of your life?
polkadot3155 6
I was going to give this a thumbs up until I saw it was at 69, so I thought I better leave it :)
MicroFuturism 1
This stuff really confuses me: apparently there's a lot of guys who have this problem, yet none of the guys I've ever met. Maybe they hide?
sammyjanette 17
Awe I think we found someone who's been hiding! No need to be a jerk just because she found out your little secret.
coffee_man900 16
Nice #23. I like it. :)
lajaynay 15
Who ever said she was sleeping with them? She could simply be having conversations with guy friends about that topic and they have never had that problem.
gladstone123 5
People who have this problem would OBVIOUSLY talk about it. Right.
TheDrudgeChild 4
23 - she's 16, it's a problem regardless.
G0odgrief 0
I've never met a sixteen year old who doesn't have this problem. half of them cum at the thought of sex for goodness' sakes
hawaiianfire 0
When I was 16, I had the exact opposite problem. I had to go for hours before I could finish. Going for that long is worse than going for 2 minutes, 2 hours in and it feels like your bumping bruises against each other :/.
le_troll 0
Lajaynay (48), nice rack.
lostmongoose 23
A lot of guys lie about how long they last.
GimmeFive 10
I'm sorry... At least ur experienced?
berichsoon 11
He's got a long way to go this is just the start
sadistmonkey 19
Making love for Making love for two Making love for two minutes When it's with me girl you only need two minutes 'cause I'm so intense
GotBrains 0
Flight of the conchords
daisy963 4
Haha well two mins is all you got ;)
CuteDumBlonde64 11
Hey slowly but surely:)
zowieandzander77 1
2 minutes is not slowly...
challenger15 4
At least he improved
coffee_man900 16
Encourage, don't Discourage. Oh and never tell him that you told the whole World about it. :)
br0ccoli 15
I think you need to communicate more with Jackhammer Jeremy on how he needs to slow it down. Also, put a microwave dinner in. You'll probably have to wait a few seconds for it though. I know you'll be starving with the appetite you'll worked up from all that sex.
br0ccoli 15
*work Smh
SebastianG 2
Guinness Book of World Records.. MAKE SOME ROOM!