She can't dump him after he has already dumped her...

Ah, you're right. I think you were talking to 1, but even I just zoomed past the sentence where she said he dumped her. Derp. xD

Leave the man and his goose alone. Maybe he's had it for a long time.

.... Maybe he's been insane for a long time too

AFLACK!!! :D

Jeremy Lin.

^WTF???

87 - Jeremy Lin has nothing to do with the FML, fanboy.

Oh sorry 15.. Should have made it a little clearer.

By stating his age you've implied he's being childish, just making it even clearer that you don't understand the bond between him and his goose. YDI!

87-WTF does Jeremy Lin have to do with the FML or comments u commented on?

As weird as it is for a 36 year old male to be that attached to a stuffed animal, it's still important for a significant other to be understanding and accepting of the things that are important to him. Although dumping someone over a stuffed animal is a bit extreme. Either he was looking for any excuse to get out of the relationship (and wasn't man enough to just say it wasn't working), or there's some psychological issues to be worried about. Either way OP is probably better off. She can find a man more suited to her.

I know right? If he's willing to dump you over that I'd say he's a bit of a loon...

65 - Pun intended?

the reason he dumped her is because she wouldn't "play" goose for him.

Op should have just played "duck, duck, goose" but seriously, fyl op for having to be with someone that immature, his loss, not yours!

Are you sure he's 36 and not 6?

I'd dump someone if they didn't like my stuffed goose too! Don't you know what trials and tribulations men go through to get the Grand Mof to give us one? We're talking years of dedication, pain, and tears! Don't EVER put down the goose... Or put the goose down, down... Wtf was I saying?

Just get a stuffed giraffe to make him jealous.. He'll come back to you

Smh..... I see you along the same lines as Op's ex. Except yours will be a stuffed bear.

I usually find your stuff hilarious.... This one I don't get.....

Then I'd search "nope, Chuck Testa"

Wow dude your joked are shitty

Jokes*

I dont understand how Chuck Testa is even remotely funny :|

#33, #66, Chuck Testa is a taxidermist who boasts that he makes the most lifelike stuffed animals. If there was ever an FML that warranted a Chuck Testa reference, this is it!

Perdix I have 0 clue on why you got thumbed down. I thought this was perfect for a Chuck Testa reference as well :)

Best EVAR.

perdix. Stuffing was just a metaphor for him "goosing" the goose. What? Too much?

Thank you for explaining

Is it that hard to spell ever?

115 - Grammar, bitch. :3

It must be woman rating me down

Lol

Evolution isn't going from being attached to a stuffed goose to not being attached to a stuffed goose. He clearly just has some mental issues.

Respect the goose man respect the goose

....wait. The Chuck Testa comment got thumbed down, but this one is okay? :P I don't understand fmlers' logic.

Me neither. I'm probably getting thumbed down just for saying this.

If you don't understand, why must you post your lack of intellect? Is your comment count that low to require deep responses to good FMLers like perdix? Oh and perdix; you forgot the stuffed high school crush;)

57 How's perdix's ass smell?

#62, sometimes it smells like Irish Spring, and other times, not nearly as nice (especially when I run low on cotton balls). I'm not sure why you wanted to know, butt there it is.

#90 go back to watching cartoons..

... and when the fuzz ask who done it, blame it on the teddy bear, I'm sure they'll believe it.

Exactly! Never get between a man and what he holds dear, like me, if someone gets between me and my fridge, they're losing an arm, if that fridge has bacon, they die

What?

Put yourself in the others persons shoes..

Imagine the shoe on another foot.. Walk a mile .., etc.. But goose

It doesn't work if you have to explain it

No shit didn't know that one

Again like the repliers to 10.. Don't comment if you're too stupid to get the joke! Having 6 people posting "durr I dun get it" is what makes it lack comedy. Although I Do find it funny that every derp is from the U.S.

Yea every single person from the United States is really stupid, completely 100% accurate generalization! great job!