Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don't understand the bond between him and his stuffed goose. He's 36. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML
PunkChik27
United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different. His only example? He likes ham and I don't. FML
Anonymous
Is this dude a puma?
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML
stunned
United States
The GOAT
Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Anonymous
Brookfield, United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML
Who's your daddy, snake girl?
I have had it with these mf snakes on this mf plane! Everybody strap in!
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for refusing to have anything to do with "our" pet snake. The same snake I told him not to buy for his son a few months ago, because I knew the kid would get bored with it and dump the responsibility onto us. FML
Games
Gamers rise up
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because his online gaming friends don't like it when I ask him to spend time with me. FML
rotezora
Basel, Switzerland
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML
cclllc
Weatherford, United States
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
Top comments
capt_awesome1 11
that's a reason to dump someone ?
darwinism 30
Sometimes I am sad that evolution seems to skip some people. On the bright side OP, you can now strenghten the bond between you and your vibrator.
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Comments (95)
hateevryone 15
you're better off.
myobsession 6
That was his way of letting you know how much better the goose feels compared to you. He'd rather **** a stuffed animal.
MickGold 8
Omg, is his name Joe? Is the goose's name Boris? Is he from Blue's Clues? Sorry, that made me think of Joe from Blue's Clues with his stuffed-- oh wait, it's a duck-- duck, Boris. If that's him, I guess now I have another reason I loved Steve more than Joe. Haha;)
KM96 24
Aren't stuffed animals for kids? Or was it a real goose that was stuffed, coz that's a little creepy ... :S
xxGhost_Wolfxx 2
YDI, you will never understand the bond between a man and his stuffed goose.
LTpast 3
There are two sides to every story, who's to say the girlfriend didn't throw out the goose? Or maybe something even worse, even though he had explained that the stuffed animal was important to him. Though
LTpast 3
*Though maybe I'm just wrong about the whole thing and he's a total loon.
lorenaleeye_fml 4
Obviously he has issues
dpgft10 0
The bond between man and stuffed goose is an an ancient powerful one stretching back to the early 1800s.
breannasauraus21 2
He must be ducked in the head. :D
SoCalKay 3
I'm sorry that sucks haha but thank you for the laugh