Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I gave a safe sex speech to teens at my local high school. This was just ten minutes after my girlfriend had texted me telling me she's pregnant. FML
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML
Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML
Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML
Today, after ranting to my best friend about how all our friends are having kids and how teenage pregnancy will ruin their lives, she announced to me that she's pregnant. FML
Today, not only did I find out that my 13 year-old daughter is pregnant, I found out that she did it on purpose "to prove that she’s responsible." FML
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
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Top comments
Arenick 0
Im guessing your daughter never came to one of these speakings right?
dspadres 0
I didn't know Sarah Palin visited FML! Awesome.
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Comments (270)
pbuk 0
Congratulations on coming face to face with reality. Celibacy! Idiot.
antiflamer5 0
FYL
immaeatchu336 0
YDI for promoting celibacy!
conan6 0
YDI for having a hoar.
imfeelingmad 0
This is why it's a bad idea to promote celibacy! The reality is that young people are always going to want to experiment. If from a young age they are told about safe sex and that they should always wear a condom then teen pregnancy rates would go down and that's the most important thing! Of course celibacy is always an option, but for most people not a realistic or desirable one.
dnbt 0
W-H-O-R-E. *****.
serpicosghost 0
guess you should've been teaching about condoms instead of celibacy. YDI dumbass
Elsan_fml 4
You TOTALLY deserved for promoting celibacy!
elena_11 0
You fail completely. If you're stupid enough not to give that kid up for adoption, then you know who's going to take care of it? YOUR MOTHER. You shpuld have listened, idiot.
boatkicker 5
Thank you! I posted a rather extended form of this a while ago but I dont think anyone noticed it. Anyways, thank you!
Fred_Burroughs 0
If my Mom kept telling me to be celibate (abstain from sex for my WHOLE LIFE!) I'd probably rebel too! Maybe if someone had bought the OP a dictionary before she went off doing her public speaking then this might not have happened. When will parents learn that in this day and age almost nothing is going to stop kids from having sex. It's sad but true. Start teaching your kids about safe sex so they're at least prepared for it. Another thing to learn about teens is the more you tell them they can't do something the more they want to do it to spite you.