Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML
Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML
Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML
Today, it's my birthday, I once again had to remind my best friend of this fact, like I have every year for the past 20 years. FML
Today, the only person who remembered my birthday was my stalker ex. He left condoms, birth control, furry handcuffs, and a lingerie set in my mailbox, with a note saying to prepare for our anniversary. We went out for a week. In sixth grade. FML
Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I stumbled across my school bully on Facebook. She's a successful business owner and engaged to be married. I can't land a job and am hopelessly single. The b***h that served as the catalyst for my depression and suffered no repercussions is getting married on my birthday. FML
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
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Top comments
TheEpicFoo 0
That's one determined bully.
worldcupcheer17 0
call the cops he's a creepy ass stalker lmao
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Comments (390)
chanta24 10
change your phone number?
Psyk_fml 11
Sounds like someone's repressing highly homosexual tendencies. Call him on it, preferably in a mocking manner. If he's a repressed homophobe he'll be too embarrassed to do it again, but if he comes out of the closet and straight onto you.... you know you can change your number, and get his blocked, right? I believe you can also keep your own (changed) number from being printed in the directory.
Snerdatron 0
I'm thinking restraining order.
strawberrykiwi_c 0
change your phone number!
miume16 0
get a new cell phone silly
SpeechQween94 14
Bullies suck!!! Feel for you.
ElenaBeattie 0
report to the cops!!!
Mattheis 0
tell him your address and wait patiently by the door with a shotgun
dansco 25
Change you phone number ffs!
wrmagee291 0
That's a shame dude. You seriously need to assert yourself, get some ghanja, and seriously put a stop to that s**t..