Today, it is my wedding day. I couldn't find my very expensive wedding dress anywhere. After almost 2 hours of panic and chaos, I found it in my pool, covered in red paint, with a note on one of my lounge chairs reading, "Today is MY wedding day, bitch." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my maid of honor, who offered to take care of my wedding dress before the D-Day, left it near her open window during heavy rain. My dress is now ruined, and she's backed out due to stress. I'm supposed to be getting married tomorrow. FML
Today, I went to pick up my wedding dress from the seamstress, only to find out that my fiancé called two weeks ago to say I wanted the dress "tie-dyed to match our new theme." She believed him. Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, I bought my wedding dress and sat it on the bed while I went to buy matching shoes. When I came home, I saw my soon to be husband on the bed sitting next to my wedding dress. Turns out he spilt Coca-Cola on the dress and was trying to get it out with carpet cleanser. FML
Today, I stretched out my wedding dress on my bed so it could air out before the big day tomorrow. Later I returned to my room only to find my cat on my wedding dress, it peed on it. FML
Today, despite my warnings, my only son married a girl I hate. To protest their marriage, I wore a white dress to the wedding. Her maid of honor "tripped" and spilled red wine all over me. FML
Today, I noticed I'd lost my wedding ring after returning home from a long, tiring day of painting our newly purchased home. After driving back and forth to the house for more than an hour to go looking for it, I found it tucked away in my back pocket. FML
Today, a mad woman squirted me with a water gun filled with paint as we were leaving the church where I just married my husband. As I was staring at this mad bitch in my ruined dress, wondering why she would do something so horrible, she ran off crying and shouting, "Sorry wrong wedding!" FML
Today, I had diarrhea and shit myself. During my wedding. In my wedding dress. FML
Today, my prom dress finally arrived. My prom was yesterday. FML
Today, I got a call that my custom order bridesmaid dress is at the apartment complex I just moved out of. They won’t give it to me because I’m no longer a resident, but they just thought I should know. The wedding’s tomorrow. FML
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Top comments
Dudernahada 0
I'm sorry but I dont get it. Is there a story behind this?
Shadic 0
They say brides are nuts for a reason.
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Comments (271)
picturetaker 0
sounds a bit funky.
lives_ppl 0
Oh my goodness. Who did that???
juliaispink 1
YA WE WANNA KNOW!!!
Incubuss 0
Oh gosh, FYL. But hey, at least it wasn't blood.
doze765 0
this makes no sense. how are we supposed to understand this?
clairebearo1 2
i'm still a bit confused in general... who would have done it? someone she knows apparently because they know of the wedding? idk its all vague. if this is true that sucks... i smell a law suit. or i'd agree with #4 knuckle shuffle it.
Shadic 0
"Bitches be crazy. The End."
NatashaLynn 0
Bitches DO be crazy.
HeatherXCore 0
Uhm...why?
darkmis1 18
This is confusing-did somebody else want to marry your fiance? You need to be a little more clear on this
DrunkenValor 0
I smell a shotgun wedding.
o0ginger0o 7
Seriously... The bride could've written the note for another purpose and whoever it was written to got pissed and got even. The groom could've done it because she was being a bride from hell. She might've outbid someone else who also wanted the church that day. Could've been a jealous ex. There's infinite possibilities here.
redbluegreen 41
When I say shotgun, you say...
DrunkenValor 0
Marry me- I mean, wedding!
redbluegreen 41
Yes, I'll marry you!
DrunkenValor 0
Well, it's official, you're now... erm... redbluegreenvalor?
redbluegreen 41
I guess so Boo! -Glomps-
DrunkenValor 0
*Shags in your general direction*
redbluegreen 41
MFEO, obviously. ♥
DrunkenValor 0
Everyone was always saying "When will rbg and dv hook up!? When!?" I guess now. Brought together by an anecdote of someone else misfortune.
redbluegreen 41
Exactly. We should honestly get an award, I think. First married couple via FMyLife. Maybe.
willyfacehenry 0
-burst through church door- I OBJECT!
DrunkenValor 0
Pffft, like I'd get into a church without immolating.
ireply_w_lyrics 0
@133 This is a Kanye-free zone none of that
OhhxGoshhxAri 0
The church thing actually is what I was thinking. I told every one of my friends that if I become a crazy bridezilla, they have the permission to slap me until I get a grip.
st0815 9
Just set yourself a budget and keep in mind that you are not royalty while you do that.
AthroughZ0_9 0
Personally, I think that the groom is cheating on the OP and the other woman did that.
Underwhelmed 0
Women are CRAAAZY.