By SterlingSilver91 - 03/09/2011 23:49 - Canada

Spicy
Today, I woke up to a text from a girl I had slept with two nights ago. It read, "Please don't get mad if you notice a rash on your private parts. Sorry in advance." FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 161
You deserved it 42 693

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Top comments

At least she told you bout it

Wow. Anytime a conversation starts with please don't be mad or we need to talk it never ends well!!

Comments

bibbit 0

First!

At least she told you bout it

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

Don't be silly, wrap your willy!!!

No Glove No Love!

If you think she's spunky wrap your monkey

Don't be a fool. Wrap your tool.

tybtab 5

COMBO BREAKER!!!!!

Damn you 27 with your combo breaking abilities!

You'll get an infection if you don't use protection!

krazy_glu3 0

Tell her 'please don't get mad if you notice herpe like bumps on your gentalia. Sorry in advance'

Oh man, I hope you don't have a rash, lol

a_nutritionist 10

@43 dont have sex anytime soon, if you think someone alerting you to a possible STI requires an immature douchebag response then you should seriously consider celibacy.

Don't be daft, wrap your shaft !

Xtra_Cheddar 3

Don't give birth wrap your girth

Ahh, the gift that keeps on giving!

Don't be a fool, wrap your spool? No One fish two fish, red fish blue fish? The cat on the hat, took a big shat? Look at that monkey, get down and spunky? Why I no GOOD at witty sex rhymes?

smilessss 4

Wrap it before you tap it!

monkeys1315 0

You should probably get that checked out

Well then they obviously didnt use a condom, so OP shouldve said "if you notice you're pregnant, my bad"

@ 106 I was going to say the same thing, but you beat me to it :(

Don't be a dummy, cum on her tummy! Wait, that doesn't fit. Take it slow, make her blow. No, that's not it, either. Ahh, I've got it now. DON'T FUCK NASTY BITCHES! That's better.

elizabeth9m 4

Put the beanie on the wienie .

when she's about to lick, wrap your dick

ppatty 0

that's all epic lol

Don't be hick, cover your dick...

mgon93 0

Wtf..

armyboy00025 3

Cage the snake, then shake and bake Wrap it with foil before you check her oil Cover your vein then drive her insane Wrap your stump before you hump Cover Ol' Willy then bang her silly Don't be a dumby, cum on her tummy

SidekickCookie 0

when she gives you affection you better wear protection that ***** might have an inffection are you paying close attention ?

SidekickCookie 0

when she gives you affection you better wear protection that ***** might have an inffection are you paying close attention ?

SidekickCookie 0

when she gives you affection you better wear protection that ***** might have an inffection are you paying close attention ?

nice ISMFOF reference ;D

kelsey_katie 17

137, Smosh, Sex Ed Rocks Right? Aha(:

This comment made my day!

Pebbles89 9

Ya think? Haha :p

Randuhh_17 4

Don't make a mistake! Muzzle your snake!

fakeaccountX 6

The cat sat on the mat.

Jdimp 1

LMAO AT COMBO BREAKER

Yeah, she said sorry too!

Don't be an idiot! Schlick it before she licks it!

Wow. Anytime a conversation starts with please don't be mad or we need to talk it never ends well!!

And never start off a sentence with "your ****** mother..."

Your ******* mother.... Is the greatest person I ever met.

slushpup9696 12

We need to talk... about how awesome you are. Can you give me some tips?

Please... Teach me how to be so awesome.

Please don't be mad but I just left my bag full of $100 bills and I'm going to need you to watch it for me.

hoodasswhitekid 0

Hey bro don't be mad but I accidentally ran over your cat last night. My bad.

Ya I learned that one the hard way!

thats ******* gross.

Igotothegym 3

Its only a rash

cIickhere 5

No pain no gain!!!!

GlitteryMasakali 1

So "Candy" understood it was your friends idea to get u a surprise hooker and let you cane her in jail.. ?!

wrong FML glitter...

I'm pretty sure they were making a reference. :D

Wouldn't telling him in advance be telling him BEFORE doing it?

Casrein 0

Best not scratch it ._.;

I suggest getting "the test"

And asking her what you should be testing for.

One of those ones that tell you what career you are suited to. I suggest funeral parlor director for you

diva_lulu 0

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
CassieMarieee 7

I think it's truly considerate on her part to give you a heads up(: Hahahha fyl.

Haha spot on

ashes1005 0

She should have said something before they slept together though

missstegner 0

Yeah, AFTER he's probably already contracted the STD!

Yeah really. Suprised to had the guts to tell you!

BrianAlarcon 0

Your first comment on "FML" N u got 60 thumbs up on it congrats!(:

CassieMarieee 7

That's pretty exciting right?! Hahaha thanks(:

BrianAlarcon 0

Aye at least she told you

Dante17 6

But she didn't she had to speak up, that means she doesn't give a damn and had her fun damaging others

muhilrashid 4

Are you positive ?

I'm not just positive, I'm HIV positive.

I think that was the point...

It was suppose to be an STD joke...