Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
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Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
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Top comments
AliSama 17
that is not a bad thing. People get sick and everyone goes to the bathroom.
csigabajnok 0
So what? He thought girls never do the "poop" thing or a female fart is just a myth? Wake up, son!
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Comments (160)
lifeisweird 0
Too funny..!
amylol_fml 0
hahhahahahahahahahahah
iceicenikkay 0
ewh i would be so embarrassed!
bobdole 0
i laughed super hard
countrygal926 0
My bf is nice enough to not bring attention to anything that i do, and he really is a saint for that
NorfolkDude 2
This isn't a FML, really. I mean he let you snuggle with him and he even whispered to you that. I would imagine that if he was being mean, he would lol at you and push you away before you came on the bed.
fatalle424 0
This reminds me of Harold & Kumar, when they get a ride home in Freakshow's truck.. Kumar starts talking all this smack about Freakshow's enormous boil and disgusting ear wax. "Dude, he's sitting RIGHT THERE." "He can't hear us - look at all the shit in his ears!" Then ten seconds of silence later, Freakshow mutters, "I heard everything you said." This FML reminded me of that so much. Very lolsy.
greenman_fml 0
no shit story should be a FML unless you shit some where other than intended. say on a person or in a cup. be proud of your woman-shit. take pride in the fact that you can rival a man-shit. i'm proud of you
sarcastic_much10 0
That sucks but I dont think he should've said anything. He could've pretended to be asleep at least lol
j00lie 0
rofl@#18