Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
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Top comments
AliSama 17
that is not a bad thing. People get sick and everyone goes to the bathroom.
csigabajnok 0
So what? He thought girls never do the "poop" thing or a female fart is just a myth? Wake up, son!
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Comments (160)
XxStraightupJG 0
Haha gross... and to #18 please don't say in a cup.. ever see 2 girls 1 cup?.. yeeeea.. not fun
howdidithappen 0
Haha! A little embarrising. At least he wasn't a dick about the situation. I mean everyone gets sick sooo...I think he did the right thing. Let you know which is a little awkward but funny, but not be mean.
Cloudy_fml 0
"no shit story should be a FML unless you shit some where other than intended." What about if someone else shat on you or your belongings... Could that be an FML shit story?
greenman_fml 0
#21 that's exactly why i said that ;) enjoy the image
greenman_fml 0
#24 well then that is an FML for the person whose stuff got shit on. not who took the shit, because that shit was intended for the belongings. the FML depends on the party you are associated with
scar988 0
ahahaha. I've had my GF do the same thing. it's no big deal. I was playful about it and we laughed it off.
Megan_fml 0
embarrassing...but why why he point it out like that???
SickOrSane 0
Atleast he didn't say, "That was so hot."
OMGhi2YOU 0
LMFAO @18 LLLLLOOOOLLLLL
bioclock 0
#24 I'm guessing you read that Craigslist article about the girl who had a guy spend the night (but didn't have sex with him), and woke up to cum on her face, bed, and in her hair, and went to the kitchen to find that he'd taken a dump on her kitchen floor? Yeah, that one was real FML quality. It was the chick's fault for bringing a stranger into her home, but still.