By desperategurl - 21/08/2012 08:39 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I was so desperate for any kind of male romantic attention that I googled "prison pen pals", and I'm considering writing to one. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 520
You deserved it 24 889

Same thing different taste

Top comments

It's a shame that all the good ones are locked up.

Steve95401 49

A "pen pal" who is in the penitentiary. Not a good choice OP.


Steve95401 49

A "pen pal" who is in the penitentiary. Not a good choice OP.

Rei_Ayanami 18

Yeah, #1! WTF were you thinking?! What's that, #3? You weren't talking to #1? If that's the case WTF were you thinking replying to their comment?

I wasn't actually trying to reply to #1's comment. I meant to just post it. I guess I hit the wrong button and didn't realize. Sorry to piss you off with my mistake asshole.

Def. not a good choice, if he gets out and finds you with another man it could get a little hairy

That is definitely a good way to lose all of your money (since they'll ask for money for their books, if you're their "real" friend they'll think you should do that), and possibly get murdered when they get out. No big deal OP

1- I think it's a great idea! At least now if the inmate gets obsessed or something, he'll be safely in prison. Til he gets out. OP better stick to death row.

You can't bail someone out of prison. Prison means they've been sentenced and is for long periods of incarceration.

tjv3 10

That's really sad OP you can write me :)

I would be more comfortable talking to the dude in prison... O.o

mhopper 13

Online dating isn't working for you?

"Arizona state prison. Where true love begins." It's kind of like eHarmony except it's free.

Perhaps she has tried online dating and it has not worked out and op thinks a prison inmate will be desperate enough to want her

74- I don't think this FML would be here if what you said hadn't been so obviously true.

OP you sound about as confused as a blind lesbian in a fish market. Maybe time to sit down and have a serious talk to yourself.

Nah OP. that's not bad. But don't go for people who'll make parole. Do what I do, get death row inmate pin-pals. I have a few I can share.... Josh Drucker, Troy Clarke.... They are nice guys. But keep a BIG HUGE RULE!!!!!! No rapists! >_< that's my rule.

It's a shame that all the good ones are locked up.

All the good ones are locked up or gay that is.

Inheritance 10

No, no 27 they turn gay with in prison! Dropping that soap must be rough!

#27 - Check the friendzone, the place where most nice guys are.

Man Skooma... If I had a nickle for every time a girl has told me, "I wish I could meet a guy like you..." well.. I'd still only have about 15 cents, but that's cause I don't have any friends...

#69. I am lucky to have a wonderful man who takes care of me and our daughter, but I agree completely the girls who complain about no good guys usually pass up the good ones, leave them as friends and go for the bad ones.

olpally 32

69- I'm always in the friend-zone.

Or the family zone. They tend to be there too.

That doesn't always stop people....

get out if it! start being 'busy' - not the shoulder to lean on that is always there. distance makes the heart grow fonder. ....they'll come back running to you. huzzah! ;)

#69 two of the guys I dated where both my best friends before....

wildsweetchild 19

The irony in DocBastard's comment is legendary...

I know the feeling. The first guy I've liked in YEARS told me I was too awesome to date. Right after he kissed me and I told him I liked him.

Sicilysstallion 2

If your luck you'll be the first person he rapes when he breaks out of prison

This is what passes for humour? Oh, and put on a damned shirt. We aren't impressed.

#5 Hey kid, I don't know just how hot you think you are but you're really not and it's not a reason to say other are fat without even seeing them. PS: Your not funny.

Sicilysstallion - I'm assuming your "fatty" comment was directed at me, since I'm the one who called you out on your fantastically-impressive shirtless picture. If you'd like to fantasise about me being obese, feel free. Unfortunately for you I'm married, and I happen not to be into guys. But your fantasies are your own. Hell, you can fantasise about me being obese in a French maid costume if it suits your fancy. Enjoy!

Thanks for the suggestion Doc! Those are some new fantasies to add to my imagination :-D

Mikeskinner 7

Dude, no one is impressed. Abs on a skinny guy are as useless as **** on a turtle.

Hahaha people are getting all mad ! **** them ! That shit was funny!

Long distance relationships hardly ever work try an online dating site that has a smaller ratio of criminals

Just got dumped from my long distance, at least she wasn't in prison I guess

16 I'm sorry to hear that it really is horrible when a relationship doesn't work out and you can't do anything to fix it

Yep, I had a long distance relationship for about 4 months. It was actually going pretty good til she started drinking and I found out she was batshit crazy and her friends threatened to hunt me down and castrate me cause she started a fight with me.

Long distance relationships work... as long as she isn't a ****/*****/deceitful bitch.

You'd be safer finding a man on Runescape

9- it's very similar to Nordic practice in Skyrim. "hai" "hey r u really a grl" "yah!" (troll face) "be my gf?" "yah be my bf?" "omg yay"

Or chatroulette. FMLs4Life - Drigr X - I'll be in the runespan on W64

My god. More people from runescape O_O... Sadly, I live there :

thetguy 4

Hahaha you had me rolling at skyrim.. I've literally played that game nonstop for months

Speaking as a nerd we aren't all that awkward! And can make for a good laugh when you get to know them!

Not on runescape world 1! That place is full of weirdos lol. But since OP's desperate, maybe she'll enjoy the weird messages random people send you.

cutielilangel 8

Oh man how I miss Runescape! It was better back in the day though. :(

So you like Kog'Maw, huh? I never really mastered Kog.. Ashe was always the easy go-to girl. I mean, her froZen arrows rock. :]

adison_anes 3

I found my ex on runescape too, we dated for over 2 years but she decided to move on to some guy she found on WoW

this and the skyrim are the comments of the night lol gave me a good laugh

saIty 17

Hitting on a homeless guy would be a much better idea.

My friend's cousin married a homeless guy. True story.

olpally 32

97- I salute you for making a great reference ;-D (hint to all those that didn't get it: check my profile)

And if that WASN'T a reference to my profile... well, now this is awkward... *cough*....

olpally 32

It was a reference to your profile!! Awkwardness avoided! :)

Good, I didn't need to be even more awkward than I already am. ...god, that was awkward wasn't it?!

olpally 32

It's cool.. I'm the same way! :D

Kyle225 3

Why cant you just go on a regular dating site?

My aunt married someone who has a life sentence. Now that's desperation.

Unitard - 1. Most prisons have a room dedicated to worship services. 2. Civilians not detained in the prison system are not allowed into the housing units (cell blocks) of prisons. 3. You're an idiot.

I'm sorry. I just look at it as "theres always someone out there either as desperate or even more". I don't understand this whole getting married to a prisoner thing. Maybe it's just me.

DrBlack 9

Theres a proper word for it actually, women who are attracted to dangerous men / criminals. It's called Hybristophilia I think.

Marrying someone with a life sentence still essentially leaves you alone. I don't get it.

Just get closer to friends while you wait. I'm sure love is around the corner ;)