Today, I was so desperate for any kind of male romantic attention that I googled "prison pen pals", and I'm considering writing to one. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML
Today, I hired somebody to send me love letters. I'm that lonely. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I decided to try something new and sign up for an online dating service, since I can't meet a decent guy in person. The first guy I talked to told me he used to be in a mental hospital for obsessing over a girl, then told me he would be dreaming of me that night. FML
Today, I'm so lonely, I wrote my number on a desk at my university, hoping someone would text me. FML
Today, I was so desperate for someone to talk to I called various restaurants pretending to be interested in ordering food, just so I could have a conversation. I called eleven different places. FML
Today, I was so desperate for a friend that I posted a Craigslist ad to find one. Now my phone's filled with spam and I still don't have any friends. FML
Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML
Today, I was so desperate for human interaction that I asked a deaf girl in my class if she liked music. I actually signed it to her. FML
Today, my college roomate and I received our first pieces of mail. We were very excited because our mailbox wasn't empty anymore. She got a package of home baked cookies in the mail from her family. I got a letter from a stranger in prison. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
It's a shame that all the good ones are locked up.
Steve95401 49
A "pen pal" who is in the penitentiary. Not a good choice OP.
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Comments (220)
JCTillery 8
DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!
nightowl713 25
What you write: Dear inmate, I'm writing to you because I'm lonely, and would like someone to keep in contact with. I hope to hear back from you soon. What the inmate read: Dear love of my life, I'm writing you because I am madly in-love with you, and I'm sorry I haven't written before, I hope you come find me when you get out, because I know your a murderer, but I trust you. **i know not all prisoners are killers or crazy, but seriously. You might as well ask to get in trouble. Get a cat if you are that lonely.
nightowl713 25
You're**
jennt89 10
don't do it!
lonecracker 5
Well there's your problem. Go put yourself in a situation where you have to meet knew people, preferably not prisoners.
89bronco 9
Shit I'll write you too save the embarrassment
gardenwhipped3 14
Just go into a bar, buy a man a drink. Problem solved. Otherwise if you just want a 'captive audience' you should just buy a cat for that, it's safer.
noisebox 1
Don't their looser predators you'll regret it...yor're better off alone
unixdude 9
Their looser predators are what? Looser than your predators?
rebel_belle1974 5
Make sure he's on death row there's no chance hell get out and visit
mosquito19 14
nothing give you more attention than good old sexual assult
texanplayer 1
Get some peanut butter and a dog...