Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Yikes
Today, my boyfriend of two years sent me a text message saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML
Sweet relief
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend that said, "Dude, I think she knows I'm going to break up with her." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML
Today, I wrote my girlfriend a song. She wrote me a 13-page letter on why we should break up. FML
Carrier pigeon
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me a two week notice for our relationship. FML
Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
Murderer! :)
Raegron 4
...or give it one last try, see how it works out? :) (we don't know anything else than what you've written, so this may be a very bad idea, I don't know :D).
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Comments (127)
chrismace 11
In FMLs you should say why you're breaking up with her, because you just sound like an ass hole.
giganticbrain 0
Then ******* let her die. People usually don't care about people like that.
phoebe_12 0
dude. whats wrong with u man. don't break up with her. she loves you so much, and you just want to dump her aside just like that? Five years, that's no lie. Ddeep down inside you love her. orelse this wouldn't happen for five years. you are probably influenced by your friends or is there another girl? whatever it is, don't ever forget the times you had together with her.
niceonejackass 0
PROTIP: She's actually cheating on you.
TheKitsune 0
Wow. Creepy much? Obviously her obsession with you is unhealthy. It's actually just another reason you really need to let her go and get into a relationship with someone that's actually STABLE.
seminoles82 0
Grow some balls drop the psycho
honeydew4u 0
uh oh.
sorroww 0
give the guy some props, atleast he gives a shit
RandomCommenter 0
F your L? What about your girlfriend? Now, you either have to be honest and break her heart, or you'll stay with her because you feel bad and she'll be in a relationship with someone who no longer wants to be with her. F her L, for now.
JohnnyOnTheSpot 0
x clingy much? no wonder you want to break up with her. x