Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years sent me a text message saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend that said, "Dude, I think she knows I'm going to break up with her." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML
Today, I wrote my girlfriend a song. She wrote me a 13-page letter on why we should break up. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me a two week notice for our relationship. FML
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Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
Murderer! :)
Raegron 4
...or give it one last try, see how it works out? :) (we don't know anything else than what you've written, so this may be a very bad idea, I don't know :D).
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Comments (127)
rachs1161 0
y u wanna break up, if its a good reason then jus do it. don't waste the valuable time that u both could b using to find some1 else or screwing around having fun or whatever
jenniferhill 0
Sorry to say you break up with her anyways.. If it's not ment to be it's not ment to be. She'll be alright.
Bayou210 0
that sucks, guess your stuck with her for life.
zomglol 3
She's onto you! :O
jennnwoww 2
Well five years is a long time.She isn't gonna go off herself ...it's more of she will take the break up pretty hard....if you do leave her don't be a jerk about it...
spearodude 0
my ex gf said the same thing... she attempted suicide. Fml.
CourtneyBeth12 0
You're a dick!!!!!!
Super_Salo 0
No she wouldn't.
lena_redhead 0
Hey. If you are deployed you should cherish her.. I know what it is like to be heart broken while my boyfriend was in training.. don't do that to her
droptableusers 7
Tell her to start saving for her grave.