Miscellaneous: Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my...

By MikeNick - 17/12/2011 07:59 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 701

You deserved it 9 795

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Same thing different taste

How? What?

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 14:43 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 657

You deserved it 5 191

By Display - 27/09/2012 04:10 - France - Paris

Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 126

You deserved it 7 227

Slice of life

By Eleanor - 19/02/2017 23:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I tripped and fell on my open dishwasher, right onto a carving knife. I'm mostly ok, except that my nipple has been sliced neatly in half. Seriously, the two halves keep flapping open like a little mouth. It would be funnier if it wasn't so painful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 888

You deserved it 626

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 992

You deserved it 32 359

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 06:29 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 090

You deserved it 10 267

By Anonymous - 15/09/2010 21:20 - United States

Today, in marching band, the guy in front of me backed up too far. As we turned, the back of his trombone hit mine, smashing it into my lip. I had to finish the song, sending blood down my horn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 690

You deserved it 4 159

By anonymous - 04/08/2015 20:56 - United States - Ballwin

Today, while shaving in the shower, my mother banged on the bathroom door to tell me something, right as I went to shave under my left armpit, causing me to jump and cut open my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 629

You deserved it 2 053

By Luna - 22/07/2012 02:30 - United States - Carmel

Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 686

You deserved it 3 530

By DroppedTheSoap - 26/04/2019 04:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, while trying to sexily wash my man in the shower, I dropped the body wash bottle. The pump grazed my nipple, making it bleed. As if that didn't kill the mood, I now have a Star Wars bandaid on my boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 324

By Bigpoppa0507 - 31/08/2011 14:02 - Canada

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 403

You deserved it 14 643

Jays7 10

Saturday 17 December 2011 12:10

That's what you get for playing the Trumpet. Nah I joke, FYL indeed

AmberL 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 12:17

Ouch! I'm trying to picture this happening, and when I do, I see droopy man boobs getting in the way.

Comments

lilloco49 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 17:26

Someone was paying the trumpet naked our what were you blowing

sjhill 32

Saturday 17 December 2011 17:40

oh! Well done! Interesting way to play the trumpet indeed. Are you sure someone wasn't there with you? ;)

afulks78 11

Saturday 17 December 2011 17:43

Ouch:(

wordbigbird 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 17:57

Try turning the heat up

LilSideTwerk 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:07

that's what you get for not playin clarinet!

bizarre_ftw 21

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:18

What were you using your trumpet for?

hpetey64 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:28

Um, the name is "mikenick" so I'm guessing your a guy.....?

kulliken 5

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:32

Kinky.

sgtdavisadam 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:36

Uhh..ok..how did you manage that

cuddlebunny3548 11

Saturday 17 December 2011 18:37

Ouch

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Today, I came home from work to see a pair of panties I hadn't worn lying on the floor. I picked them up and they were all crunchy. It turns out that while I'm away, my boyfriend uses my underwear as a vessel for his semen. He claims this is normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 398

You deserved it 363

Today, it's been a week since I was dumped. I planned to stay at my apartment, cry, and eat chocolate in peace. My roommate decided to have loud sex with her boyfriend in the apartment. She refused to quiet down, saying, "My body, my rules." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 557

You deserved it 4 759

The Top

Today, I was at work, and some people came in looking for a particular couch. After looking for over an hour on the wholesalers website my boss walks over, makes me take my lunch break and then calls over the couple and takes all the credit for the sale. We work on commission. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 693

You deserved it 3 137

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 242

You deserved it 4 363

Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 962

You deserved it 5 402

Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 075

You deserved it 4 223

Today, my college instructor told me I hadn't actually failed a big exam as he originally said. It turns out he'd mixed me up with another student. Now thanks to the power of gossip, half my class thinks I slept with him so he'd switch my grade with the other student's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 652

You deserved it 1 354

Today, my family and I noticed that our Christmas tree had been stolen from our front garden. Last night, a group of girls from my village posted a status on Facebook stating how drunk they were, and how they had stolen a Christmas tree. I "liked" it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 751

You deserved it 15 988

Same thing different taste

How? What?

Slice of life

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