Miscellaneous: Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my...

By MikeNick - 17/12/2011 07:59 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 701

You deserved it 9 795

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Same thing different taste

How? What?

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 14:43 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 657

You deserved it 5 191

By Display - 27/09/2012 04:10 - France - Paris

Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 126

You deserved it 7 227

Slice of life

By Eleanor - 19/02/2017 23:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I tripped and fell on my open dishwasher, right onto a carving knife. I'm mostly ok, except that my nipple has been sliced neatly in half. Seriously, the two halves keep flapping open like a little mouth. It would be funnier if it wasn't so painful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 888

You deserved it 626

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 992

You deserved it 32 359

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 06:29 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 090

You deserved it 10 267

By Anonymous - 15/09/2010 21:20 - United States

Today, in marching band, the guy in front of me backed up too far. As we turned, the back of his trombone hit mine, smashing it into my lip. I had to finish the song, sending blood down my horn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 690

You deserved it 4 159

By anonymous - 04/08/2015 20:56 - United States - Ballwin

Today, while shaving in the shower, my mother banged on the bathroom door to tell me something, right as I went to shave under my left armpit, causing me to jump and cut open my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 629

You deserved it 2 053

By Luna - 22/07/2012 02:30 - United States - Carmel

Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 686

You deserved it 3 530

By DroppedTheSoap - 26/04/2019 04:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, while trying to sexily wash my man in the shower, I dropped the body wash bottle. The pump grazed my nipple, making it bleed. As if that didn't kill the mood, I now have a Star Wars bandaid on my boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 324

By Bigpoppa0507 - 31/08/2011 14:02 - Canada

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 403

You deserved it 14 643

Jays7 10

Saturday 17 December 2011 12:10

That's what you get for playing the Trumpet. Nah I joke, FYL indeed

AmberL 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 12:17

Ouch! I'm trying to picture this happening, and when I do, I see droopy man boobs getting in the way.

Comments

lauralavenderbab 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 22:13

Well that's gotta be difficult

DPersa7 4

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:01

I also play the trumpet

wellthatsukx 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:01

How!?! That must take some talent, or a very specific series of events to cause that.

SeiferAlmas 4

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:04

Just another reason why being a percussionist is better. =D

Ssampson1464 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:21

life's a bitch

Rasetsu 10

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:35

OW >.

tinkerbell1177 5

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:37

Hahahahhahahahahaha. Oh my. Tooo funny.

ColorguardChik 1

Saturday 17 December 2011 23:59

Dude that sucks!

bballforward33 10

Sunday 18 December 2011 0:32

Band queer

beebananaz88 0

Sunday 18 December 2011 0:47

Go get it pierced

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The Top

Today, I had whiplash after my dad and I were rear ended by a suburban. Despite the state trooper saying I should go, my dad delayed taking me to the ER because he wanted to pick up the dog from "doggy daycare" and take her for a nice long walk, while I waited for my mom to come home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 048

You deserved it 1 523

Today, I had a long talk with my now ex-boyfriend. I explained why I'm not comfortable with him bringing up his new female coworker multiple times a day, talking with her about their kinks and fetishes, or possibly being around her outside of work. We've been together for nine years. He's only known her for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, I didn't mind paying a little bit extra for my manicure because I forgot how nice it was to have someone hold your hand. Even if it was an old Asian lady. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 309

You deserved it 5 662

Today, a woman left our first date just because I didn't like the same character as her on a TV show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 153

You deserved it 2 642

Today, after having been off due to the holidays, I awoke to several missed calls and texts from my supervisor asking where I was. Fearing losing my job, I drove the entire 2-hour commute thinking I’d missed a day. I hadn't; he was just trying to get my weekly reports early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 878

You deserved it 1 358

Today, my manager called when I was watching porn. I picked up after pausing the video, but somehow the video kept playing. I'm pretty sure she definitely heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 1 351

Today, I was watching a movie with my parents. They were both on the bed, and I was lying on the floor next to their bed. Halfway through the movie, apparently forgetting that I was in the room, my parents started getting friendly. Three feet away from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 727

You deserved it 4 840

Today, while creeping on my boyfriend's ex-wife’s Facebook, I found out that he used to call her the same nicknames he now calls me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 088

You deserved it 910

Same thing different taste

How? What?

Slice of life

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