Miscellaneous: Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special... - FML

By Anonymous - 17/10/2013 22:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special type of bubble wrap that cannot be popped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 716

You deserved it 4 900

Money, well, get back, I'm alright Jack…

Dementia or hate? You decide

Goldmining

By hhhhhhhpeterwut - 19/02/2013 03:21 - United States - Bethesda

Today, as my lame excuse to not give a guy I met at a club my phone number, I told him I didn't have a cell phone. Guess what I checked when he asked me what time it was a few minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 337

You deserved it 54 700

Today, on "Dr. Phil"…

By Anonymous - 06/08/2020 02:01

Today, my dad got upset when one of his employees showed a romantic interest in my mom. Both parents were totally fine, though, with that same employee announcing his engagement to my 15-year-old sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 101

Light sentence

By ClumsyTeen - 13/05/2021 23:57 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I tried to sneak in at 2 a.m. after going out, since I'm 16, but I tripped over a pair of slippers and landed flat on my face. My body fell quietly, but I let out a very loud and guttural, "Oof." After about a minute, I lifted my face to see my mom standing over me. I'm now grounded for 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 220

You deserved it 1 808

By biomajor99 - 22/04/2015 21:46 - United States - Middletown

Today, I had to explain to my 23-year-old female friend that when I get my hysterectomy, I will still be able to poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 695

You deserved it 2 148

By Anonymous - 17/06/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, my friend told me that he was having a scrabble tournament at his house with a bunch of our friends. I told my dad about the tournament and he gave me a special scrabble dictionary to bring. Hesitantly, I brought the dictionary and as I walked in everyone was playing beer pong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 357

You deserved it 12 965

By Anonymous - 18/10/2014 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 266

You deserved it 14 444

By kaitlynn - 01/02/2010 20:56 - France

Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 803

You deserved it 10 216

By Anonymous - 10/06/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, my cousin taught me how to make dinner. My cousin is in first grade and I'm in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 474

You deserved it 41 110

By tacky_unrefined - 16/02/2009 23:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of four months broke up with me via text message. He spelled my name wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 417

You deserved it 4 065

Judgmental people are the worst

By samantha - 09/03/2021 16:59

Today, I was called a horrible excuse for a mother just for buying formula for my baby. I just don’t produce any milk of my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 71

By queenxalee - 11/11/2013 23:58 - United States - Orange

Today, I learned I was conceived to the sounds of a Spice Girls album. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 050

You deserved it 4 310

By BrokeAndSad - 30/03/2015 01:09 - United States - Columbus

Today, I lost hundreds of dollars in gift cards. Robbed? No. Mugged? Don't think so. My roommate threw them away after he got water on them, thinking that it rendered them unusable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 423

You deserved it 2 586

Better out than in

By flying13 - 03/11/2010 07:27 - United States

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 424

You deserved it 13 260

By karebear - 09/09/2010 05:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months said he wasn't going to break up with me, he was just going to stop touching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 606

You deserved it 4 626

Karen strikes again

By lanadelreylover - 04/06/2021 17:01

Today, I was working at a carnival. I was on the ticket booth, and middle aged lady came up asking for a refund for $50 worth of tickets she didn’t use. However, there are signs saying I can’t give out refunds. She spent 10 minutes yelling at me to give her a refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks 967

You deserved it 58

By Anonymous - 28/02/2012 02:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my wife cheated on me with a guy from her work three times, two months before I proposed to her. She decided to tell me three months into our marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 563

You deserved it 2 633

By lisa - 22/12/2010 18:03 - United States

Today, my recently married friend took off her wedding ring to make bread. Being single and pathetic, I tried it on to see what it would look like. It got stuck on my finger. The ER doctor had to cut it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 440

You deserved it 51 617

By Anonymous - 17/02/2010 07:39 - United States

Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 176

You deserved it 2 587

By womboman - 30/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Spicy

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 659

You deserved it 3 206

By erin1985 - 22/02/2010 00:31 - Australia

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. I leaned down to get something out of my bag and hit my head on some protruding concrete. I said I was fine. Then blood came running down my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 842

You deserved it 2 874

Right in the miniature tree

By Anonymous - 31/01/2017 16:41 - Netherlands - Veldhoven

Today, my parents got mad at me because I laughed when they called the bullseye "bonsai" while watching darts. They've always thought it was bonsai. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 503

You deserved it 466

By Anonymous - 27/09/2010 15:58 - United States

Today, I'm a 22 year-old guy with a 11:00 pm curfew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 264

You deserved it 16 374

By itsme - 08/07/2019 04:00

Today, we got a letter regarding my sister's college career and an appointment she was required to go to. This seems fitting, since she's a senior in high school, or at least she would be if she hadn't passed away a little over a year ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 758

You deserved it 103

By Swaby - 01/03/2009 08:14 - Hong Kong

Today, I found out I could not go to the Philippines because I have never had Chicken Pox. The school took the radical decision to prohibit students who have never had Chicken Pox to leave the college. I am condemned to stay in Hong Kong in some shitty project because I am a healthy young man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 991

You deserved it 4 445

Haters Gonna Hate

By apparentlyweird - 28/08/2018 22:00

Today, my dad's new girlfriend's daughter came over with them. She had a tantrum because my brand new computer, which I worked and saved for, was better than her notebook, which was bought for her. So what did she do? Oh, she threw it off my desk. For some reason I'm being yelled at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 912

You deserved it 211

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 07:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 946

You deserved it 3 805

By Anonymous - 08/09/2013 23:20 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my 16-year-old daughter burned all her baby photos because they were unflattering and made her "look fat". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 366

You deserved it 4 411

By Anonymous - 04/08/2019 00:01

Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 874

You deserved it 112

By Anonymous - 01/06/2009 19:07 - United States

Today, I had the Monday meeting that I have had every week for 8 months. We had new people joining today. One of my bosses went around the room introducing people, and he forgot my name. I've been sitting across from him with a nametag for 8 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 060

You deserved it 4 030

By TOOshort - 23/04/2019 16:00

Today, several of my apartment complex neighbors walked right by me as I struggled to clean the inches thick, icy snow off of my SUV. I’m 4’11. Not one person offered to assist me, even after I slipped and fell several times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 2 167

By Anonymous - 21/05/2011 21:29 - Denmark

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 34 781

By Nick - 05/06/2016 21:59

Today, I was swimming in a public pool, and I felt a tug on my swimming trunks. It was my grandma snorkeling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 686

You deserved it 1 211

By BigBlue - 19/03/2014 23:19 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 126

You deserved it 5 599

By dumbass - 15/12/2010 03:00 - United States

Today, I got into my first car accident. I hit my own parked car while trying to drive my mother's car into the garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 860

You deserved it 27 014

By James - 31/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 335

You deserved it 17 951

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 22:51 - United States

Today, my fiancé turned 21. I stayed up and took care of him for 3 hours while he puked his guts out. When I FINALLY get him to bed, he jumps up and rips the lid off a plastic container on the floor and pukes in it. It was full of all my yearbooks, baby pictures, and childhood memories. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153 391

You deserved it 14 338

By Anonymous - 19/06/2013 16:12 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 943

You deserved it 5 260

Ungrateful

By Anonymous - 30/01/2021 16:58

Today, even though I help cook and clean on a daily basis, I got called lazy and told I don't do anything around the house. I live with my parents and twin 18-year-old brothers and they all say this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 83

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 221

You deserved it 5 609

By ihatemyjob - 12/09/2010 07:23 - Canada

Today, at work, an elderly lady came up to the cash register with a flyer in her hand, and asked if we had a certain item. I told her we did not have any left, and we would be getting more next week and if she wanted, I could give her a rain check. She hit me in the face with her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 095

You deserved it 2 769

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:24

No one should have to endure that kind of torture.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:26

theres a special place in hell for people like that...

Comments

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:24

No one should have to endure that kind of torture.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:33

Seriously, though. The person who invented that should be punched in the face.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:37

Is it even considered bubble wrap anymore?

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:46

Seriously? I cannot even conceive of the torture necessary for the inventor of this horrible material. Mayhaps the Doc can help.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:53

What sort of diabolical mind do you think I have? Do you really think I sit around thinking up new and unique torture devices in my spare time? Ok, I admit it, I do. I call my newest one "The Machine".

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:54

Your "Machine" gave me a Red Ring of Death on the 3rd day....

\ 28

Friday 18 October 2013 9:05

Does "The Machine" work by shoving Coke bottles up people's rectums???

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:14

Yes thank you for volunteering

Ashamed_Sister 60

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:14

Which evil genius creates such a vicious thing?

AnOriginalName 19

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:17

#13, only punched in the face? That spawn of Satan should be popped.

suboy 10

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Friday 18 October 2013 15:54

This is even worse than the bubble wrap i just got that doesnt even make a sound. It just deflated, like my excitement.

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Friday 18 October 2013 18:39

That's the evilest thing I can imagine. :')

MikaykayUnicorn 36

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Friday 18 October 2013 23:26

Why is this an fml?

kyu_Q 19

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Saturday 19 October 2013 6:24

ARRRRGGHHH THE HORROR (snaps eyelids)

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Sunday 20 October 2013 3:38

This is the saddest fml i have ever read. Poor OP

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Friday 15 May 2015 13:15

No, it's so horrible. Hope you found some real bubble wrap!

tacos_are_good 8

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:25

I feel that feel.

caohm 18

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:48

I think you mean to say challenge accepted.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:56

I think he meant to say "I gotz swag", to which McDonald's will hire right away

tacos_are_good 8

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Friday 18 October 2013 10:56

I think SHE ment to say no to all of that.

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Friday 18 October 2013 21:10

that stache really threw them off, eh?

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:25

What animal would invent such a terrible thing?

thisawkwardchick 15

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:51

I agree. This should be a sin.

Ashamed_Sister 60

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:16

It is a sin and that evil inventor will face eternal damnation.

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:25

some people want to watch the world burn

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Monday 21 October 2013 3:51

DAMN IT COMMIES WHY DO YOU TORTURE US?!

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:26

theres a special place in hell for people like that...

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Friday 18 October 2013 10:03

I believe you're referring to the throne.

xXxGraveStonexXx 20

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Friday 18 October 2013 16:25

DX They make that?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?? I've lost faith in the world. Bubblewrap is meant to be popped.

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Friday 18 October 2013 18:37

Right next to child molesters and people who talk at the theatre, #4.

TheGreatAlexande 12

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:26

You obviously just aren't trying hard enough.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:27

Where there's a will, there's a way. It can be popped.

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Friday 18 October 2013 13:03

You know it girl! Go pop those bubbles OP!

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Friday 18 October 2013 15:14

I once came across such wrap. Me and my friends were so frustrated, we duct-taped it to the road and had one of my friends run over it with his truck. Unpoppable? Nope! Also, the fact that it was so tough meant that when it did pop, it was a glorious sonic boom that shook the earth, and rattled tea cups in China.

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Friday 18 October 2013 17:02

Um, I hate to pop your bubble...

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:27

What kind of sorcery is that?!

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Friday 18 October 2013 17:10

Double, double toil and trouble, Fire burn and cauldron bubble. Cool it with baboon's blood, Then the charm is firm and good.

Cazz91 21

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:27

The joys of popping bubble wrap have been shattered! What is this world coming to?

IloveToLaugh143 21

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Saturday 19 October 2013 6:00

Some Star Trek shit or something.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:28

try a hand drill, trust me.

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Friday 18 October 2013 8:28

I don't want to live on this planet anymore!

AnOriginalName 19

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Friday 18 October 2013 9:19

I like this planet, though. Whoever invented such a travesty is the one who needs to be removed from this planet!

Nearly

Today, I live in Turkey and the dollar has risen to 13 lira. Just turks understand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 4

Today, I realized the cute girl with a nice ass, long hair and a great personality I've been talking to is actually a very gay dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16

You deserved it 35

Spicy

Spicy

Today, I had a horrible date with this guy I’ve been seeing. He wanted me to give it up, but I wasn’t ready, so he dumped me on the spot. I went home crying to my mother and her response was, “Stop being such a prude! What are you? Ten? Grow the fuck up!” Thanks mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 66

Today, my wife and I had arranged a threesome with a guy, but I was late home so they “had the threesome without me.” It’s not cheating, because I obviously knew she was going to have sex with him during the threesome, but me not being there makes me mad and I can’t coherently explain why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 637

You deserved it 713