Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely...

acab93 10 February 2011, 22:37 United States

Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML

265 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Dammit 7 July 2012, 04:45 Long Beach, United States

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

372 comments

Anonymous 14 January 2010, 19:41 United States

Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML

106 comments

zac545 19 February 2009, 06:14 United States

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

48 comments

Face 9 January 2010, 10:12 Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

99 comments

HamHanded 10 March 2017, 09:17

Ham-fisted attempt

Today, my loving but absent-minded father gave me a packet of ham for my birthday, which would be pretty shit even if I hadn't been a strict vegetarian for the last 27 years. FML

13 comments

whymommywhy 21 April 2009, 03:11 United States

Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML

232 comments

Username 16 April 2011, 05:14 United States

Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML

105 comments

erinbarto 17 October 2019, 20:00

Soon.

Today, I listened to my mom having a conversation with my dog, asking him if he ate my hamster. My hamster isn't even dead. FML

6 comments

Anonymous 20 March 2023, 18:00 United States

Leftovers

Today, my daughter brought home her class hamster for the weekend. It escaped and we spent hours searching for it. We later found it in the fridge, eating our leftover pizza. I never knew hamsters had such a refined palate. FML

1 comment

pigglepigglepiggle 24 November 2009, 02:30 United States

Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML

84 comments

Doortje 30

11 February 2011, 01:09

So you thought a ham was an animal? What did you think it looked like? What sound did you think it made?

ScaryyMary 14

11 February 2011, 01:18

Actually, ham is a fruit. Haven't you ever driven past a ham farm and seen the inbred Republicans plucking the ripe, juicy, pink hams from the tallest trees? I can take you to one, it's such an inspiring sight. Afterward, we can go snipe hunting, I know a GREAT spot.