Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
Today, my wife was in labour and bouncing on her inflatable ball to relieve the pain when it popped. This thing has lasted her entire pregnancy and it chose to burst now, sending her crashing to the floor groin first while 8 cm dilated. And as the husband, it is of course all my fault, you bastard. FML
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
Impregnate her.
XxHoPPoxX 8
Balls to you
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Comments (260)
Beck2209 0
Dump the crazy bitch
Sumo69 9
You mean today you lost the debate with your girlfriend
Sumo69 9
The answers easy their got to be a mom out there that had a sex change's kick her in the nuts/him and ask her what was more painful
pr1mo 0
I think she kicked him in the balls so she wouldn't have to give birth.
liltexasdancer 0
Whether she's right or wrong, she's right. Just agree with whatever she says if you want to be able to still have children in future times.
Inheritance 10
Haha just noticed I said when instead of win so unlike me..
bizarre_ftw 22
Suggest you two have a kid. Or, if you're not there in your relationship, that she becomes a surrogate mum, I'm pretty dang sure they get paid so you can twist it like "hey it doesn't hurt That bad, guys get kicked in the balls All the time and they're only out for a minute or two before they're fine again" etc... Watch, wait, enjoy. And hey, a little extra cash (or a kid, which ever you choose) Btw, don't forget to gloat in the delivery room
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I always thought guys were total wusses when they got hit in the balls. But then again, I'm a girl, so I don't know. Still, I'm sure it hurts 10 times worse pushing a BABY out from between your legs than it does getting kicked in the balls. YDI for trying to tell her that having a baby is less painful.
purpleisbloo 13
He didn't tell her that... He said he thought having a baby would be more painful, not less! Did you read the whole thing?
yusaku02 20
@133: You must have ridden the short bus because you're retarded. Go read it again.
CRC_101 31
Ah... your girlfriend's a bit of a bitch. Doesn't sound like a good relationship if she would willingly cause you that much pain. o.0 A bit ****** up, actually x` Naturally speaking, giving birth wins by far; I'd be on your side. Still, I agree that some women find ways to make it less painful. This arguement does not warrant kicking of the balls. I wouldn't say, "BREAK UP WITH HER, BREAK UP WITH HER!" on this information alone, but keep on eye on that one, and her physical distance in relation to your balls. >_>
musicluvr2000 11
Lesson learned; woman are too awesome to debate with because they always win (: