Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
Today, my wife was in labour and bouncing on her inflatable ball to relieve the pain when it popped. This thing has lasted her entire pregnancy and it chose to burst now, sending her crashing to the floor groin first while 8 cm dilated. And as the husband, it is of course all my fault, you bastard. FML
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
Impregnate her.
XxHoPPoxX 8
Balls to you
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Comments (260)
CeeCee_fml 16
I was beginning to type up an elaborate argument to this ridiculous post but, **** it. Your "point" is completely absurd.
williamcarter93 13
I don't want to get kicked in the balls, or have kids.
Krulin 8
That line of reasoning is so retarded it gets monthly cheques from the government. Do you bring new life in the world every time you get kicked in the balls? No? Congratulations, you're an idiot.
tony23h 7
Both ways, it's painful!!
SenoraTaco 4
There was a scientific test about this... Being kicked in the balls is equivalent to breaking 26 bones at once and giving birth all at the same time. Giving birth breaks 10 bones all in 1 place and well gives birth..
Chavez45 2
Knock get up
nesreen619 0
i think ur "girlfriends" has balls then..nd she has nooo idea what shes talkin bout.that topic shouldnt even be debated about,the answer is obvious!
linkinpark98 24
"Suck my robot balls!" Epic Rap Battles Of History reference.
OHai15 12
eeeeeeeeeeeeeepic rapbattleofhistory!!!!
sweetzombie88 0
I heard the equivalent to giving birth would be if you pulled your sack up over your head. But you gotta take into consideration all the things involved in giving birth. At the same time I know they'd both be painful. Btw your gf is insane either way.
ralenti 3
reminds me of when Chandler from f.r.i.e.n.d.s started a discussion with a girl who was pregnant about this. and then it got all awkward. aw, that was great.