Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
My chocolate
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
Love hurts
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Why so serious?
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
He was a very good boy
Today, my girlfriend made me a chocolate cake to try and cheer me after my dog died. My dog died because my dad fed him chocolate. FML
Top comments
imonaboat79 2
pro tip: always check with your lady first before eating the last bit of chocolate in the house. bad things can happen when you don't.
sweet_candy_ 17
Banana peels are not that hard. You big baby.
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Comments (175)
10_4Franky 0
Umm huh! (diva voice)
lizzieislovely 11
Are you ******* suicidal?!
talktomandybaby 8
are you????(;
Lolzords 11
Leave your girlfriend! She's bananas! :D
ecfrost 4
I think this is your fault if you just ate the cake without first asking if she wanted any before you ate it. I think, however, if she said you could eat it, and got mad after you did then it really is FML, OP.
zendaddy0 0
I don't know how to respond to this wtf
Baggyklown 0
Oh no! What will you do with the rest of your f'ed life? Frickin' grow a pair and shut up. There's people who would kill for a banana peel to the face just so they have some food
aliaskis 3
O_o Have you ever tried to eat a banana peel? And even if OP was a starving person who dreamed of being slapped in the face with a banana peel, it doesn't say that the gf handed over the peel afterwards for him to dispose of.
motero 0
NEVER COME BTWN A WOMAN AND HER CHOCOLATE!
saleha97 4
HAHAHAHAHA
WeTheLiving 4
well...i mean...uummm...it was chocolate cake!
RosiePatosie 0
hahaha you deserve to be hit with a watermelon! how is your life ****** in any way? a banana peel obviously doesn't hurt.