Jaws
France
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
mary
Australia
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Anonymous
Cincinnati, United States
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
foreveralone
Franklin Park, United States
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
oops
My chocolate
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
happybidet
United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
what did I do?
San Francisco, United States
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
wray16
United States
Love hurts
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
DwarfFrog
United States
Why so serious?
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
Anonymous
Saint Louis, United States
He was a very good boy
Today, my girlfriend made me a chocolate cake to try and cheer me after my dog died. My dog died because my dad fed him chocolate. FML
Top comments
imonaboat79 2
pro tip: always check with your lady first before eating the last bit of chocolate in the house. bad things can happen when you don't.
sweet_candy_ 17
Banana peels are not that hard. You big baby.
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Comments (175)
sadistmonkey 19
I can't say YDI or FYL without knowing more facts. What proportion of the total cake did you eat? If the girl actually got to have some cake, did she ask you for permission to eat it? Whose cake was it?
quite_bored 9
I have just officially lost all hope in Humanity.
Nitial 6
The cake is a lie.
TheDrop 0
translation of OP's FML: "i am dating a selfish and abusive fat girl" FML.
jess6blondie9 3
94, just because a girl likes her cake, doesn't mean she's fat!
talktomandybaby 8
hahahahahahah.this made me laugh so hard.
Athga 0
every man needs to know when to not mess with her chocolate
trappedinthevoid 0
...marry her.
guppy40000 0
She shouldnt be so violent. Is she pregnant by chance? Cake and Chocolate womans best friend?
harbqll 0
Slap her back, dump the silly twit, and go find a girlfriend that isn't ****** in the head. This ain't rocket science.