Jaws
France
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
mary
Australia
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Anonymous
Cincinnati, United States
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
foreveralone
Franklin Park, United States
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
oops
My chocolate
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
happybidet
United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
what did I do?
San Francisco, United States
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
wray16
United States
Love hurts
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
DwarfFrog
United States
Why so serious?
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
Anonymous
Saint Louis, United States
He was a very good boy
Today, my girlfriend made me a chocolate cake to try and cheer me after my dog died. My dog died because my dad fed him chocolate. FML
Top comments
imonaboat79 2
pro tip: always check with your lady first before eating the last bit of chocolate in the house. bad things can happen when you don't.
sweet_candy_ 17
Banana peels are not that hard. You big baby.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (175)
duburich 0
get another whole cake and scarf the shit right down in front of her and rub it in her face then whatever you don't eat just throw away and put the banana peel on top of in the garbage.. thatll teach her.. nut up an stand your ground.. or what will it be when ur 80 and bedridden? haha
SummerRuby 1
Calm the f*ck down, # 24. It isn't that serious.
vbmg152 19
You don't have a wife or girlfriend, do you?
YtotsDI 0
I bet he's gay
hedgerow 0
eating her muffin is okay though
wendyyyy 0
Lmfao!! Win!!
TenderWhispers 0
why is everyone talking about foreskin?
F14Shado 0
never mess with a woman and her chocolate.
coffee_enima 0
am I reading this correctly? your gf has a banana? is this a sexual reference?
nerdsgetmehot 23
You could have been slapped in the face with far worse things.
Zmeilerr 22
Oh no, not another guessing game!
Zmeilerr 22
Oh no, not another guessing game!
nerdsgetmehot 23
Haha! Just use your imagination, Zmeilerr. :P
MaddaCheeb 0
fatass
imac619 2
I hope you called the cops or punched her in the face, either way she needs to learn not to be abusive.
thebigblue 2
punch her in the face? really? Another future felon. Enjoy your daily rape in prison.
imac619 2
It's self defense, she hit him first. And that's not a felony.
manatees_r_epic 0
Call the cops? Let's see... Reciever: "911 what is your emergency?" Guy who's calling:"OMG my girlfriend slapped me with a banana peel!!!" *Beeeep* Nice....
blaine72 0
Yes, because everyone knows what a serious offense it is to slap somebody with the soft, floppy skin of a banana. Call the police immediately.
worksux200 0
that's what you get for dating a hungry hippo
allmidnighteyes 11
What if he had eaten the last latkes? Would she then be a hungry hungry Hebrew?
fthku 13
*Jew. Hebrew is the language. It can refer to the ancient "Hebrew people", but of course the various traditional foods associated with Jewish people today were (mostly) not existant back then.