By anonymous - 17/04/2012 01:59 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy
Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 900
You deserved it 7 457
Intimacy
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Top comments

supervacaneous 4
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Start by giving her a massage, then try to get laid. Sounds like she's in the mood.

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lukep135 6

Try the massage sex combo. That works every time in pleasing your lover

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Comments

dregtp 1
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That sucks, learn to use it OP

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lyssa_jean 7
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Or if you just cant get it right, use a vibrator on her. that'll get her;)

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Jonkbaby 22
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sex doesn't just involve the private parts you know..

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starman02 12

It doesn't?!.. Sex.. As in sexual intercourse? .. I'm from Canada and I dunno if you have a different kind of sex ed wherever your from BUT sex is, and always has been, involving the "private parts". If your being sarcastic someone really should make a sarcastic font! :)

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StoryOfTheYear 14
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So you mean to tell me my brother was lying to me the whole time when he said to make babies I need to stick my nose in her belly button and blow as hard as I can?

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xXUND3ADcityXx 0
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Last time I checked sex involved a guys' you know and a girls' you know...but hey what do I know

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sm0kinBCBudz 0
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Yea 25 I'm in Canada I it same classes

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Miss_Trejo 5

I agree with 16. Sex involves the entire body...

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gravygecko 2

Canada, they even manage to make sex boring.

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ZoeElizabeth 0
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He didn't say it didn't involve inside part he said it didn't JUST involve them. If you think that that is all sex is then you have bigger problems than being Canadian.

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challan 19

Well, im not visiting Canada anytime soon! For a woman, sex does involve the whole body. It also can start hours before having sex for us. A pat on the ass, a sexy whisper in the ear, brushing your fingers over her neck... Do something every time you walk by her! Try it guys, and you'll see a change.

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willisawesome 0
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This remind anyone else of that one Friends episode?

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Jonkbaby 22
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40, 54, and 55 you girls know how its done..

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resplendencerino_fml 3
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you're so stupid, it must hurt

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supervacaneous 4
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Start by giving her a massage, then try to get laid. Sounds like she's in the mood.

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lukep135 6

Try the massage sex combo. That works every time in pleasing your lover

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kikiwi_fml 9

This guy knows what he's talking about.

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deransc 19

Try to put in as much effort into sex as you do her massage

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Pentium_4 27
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dude, eat her out to warm her up instead. works well

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4rmMiami 4
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It works well... I should know

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crazycatgirl 0
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Alot of FMLs are about sex. It seems like people just can't get their sex lives together.

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lebronesque73091 12

#4 Lol, I didn't expect to read that or at least for it to be worded that way. But on a serious note, that is probably a good idea.

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lebronesque73091 12

#94 I agree. It's a shame really. But they are interesting to say the least.

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Altuna15 0
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Gotta love your way of thinking!!!

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DontClickOnMe 28

Well, massages can be pretty orgasmic sometimes...

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Nevereverland 8
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I dont know whats worse your picture , or the fact that i click on it anyway every single time!

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jayylove 1

xD your comment made my day

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eimiii_fml 0
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I just can't take that comment seriously with that picture..

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tacocrunchy12 0
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BRIAN PEPPERS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Keevarou 17
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I can't blame her kind of, getting a good massage is heavenly:) And hey, that must mean you're good at giving massages ^^ So you should be proud about that :3

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Meowingtons500 18
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Did Keev get a new account? :)

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Keevarou 17
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Eeyup I did ^_^ You guys won't get rid of me that fast :)

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StoryOfTheYear 14
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Well what happened to the old one?

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Keevarou 17
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Rage quitting ^_^ I were in a bad mood and needed some time to collect myself ^^

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LadyLol_fml 15
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Well we're glad you're back :)

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lyssa_jean 7
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This should be an fml for your gf. I'm sure you still get off......

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DuffleBagHero 4
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Not every girl has to moan while having sex, it also doesn't mean she's pleased any the less either.

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auntycj 0
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I agree. Porn is not reality.

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Meowingtons500 18
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Awe, don't feel bad OP, at least you can make her feel good in some ways. :)

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Lanewood 2
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You should feel bad OP.. You're just terrible in bed it seems

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pinkpixie06 11

Start by giving her a relaxing massage. Then make it part of your foreplay! She'll be relaxed and after your hands have been all over her body, you'll both be "in the mood".

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