By Anonymous - 12/01/2013 17:57 - Norway - Haugesund

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML
I agree, your life sucks 38 476
You deserved it 9 033

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Massage her before sex.

Remotely intelligent?

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Sounds like you need to go back to fucking school. LOL.

No more back rubs for that bitch!

Maybe op is a trained massues

So Doc and Gracehi and Schizomaniac are morons who shouldn't be commenting and yet...this is what you post..."fucking school"? What?

#14 I was thinking the exact same thing on a other story!

1 - Bring your sister back, she was so much funnier than you, moreover, she wasn't a self centered prick but what do I know.. ( actually have no idea who said sister is but I can't figure out how some one could be even more stupid than you..)

Everyone got your pitchforks and torches ready? Good! ATTACK!!!!!!!

#14, #17, #26 - what do you guys expect from someone who doesn't "do weed" cuz she's too busy "getting wasted on the real shit." No wonder she doesn't like Doc. He's actually remotely intelligent.

Remotely intelligent?

Doc - it means you're cleverer than 1, but stupider than 29

Yeah, it means your intelligence can be controlled with a remote; how cool is that?! :P

Well personally I find doc funny but I do agree with her that some more known people get thumbed up even when they say something really stupid which is annoying after a while

Looks like this is the end. The mob is closing in, prepare. For TONIGHT, YOU GOT BURIED BY THUMBS FOREVER.

So Doc is a cyborg? I knew it!

She's also 17 and "stuck between jobs." What the fuck? She can't decide between working at McDonalds or Taco Bell?

And the only class she ever studied in high school was history.

is this a social site? i just come here to look at peoples shitty lives so i can feel better about mine, but yall niggas r serious up in this bitch, yall know eachother by fuckin name!

She adores Perdix, Noor, Keevarou, Every1luvsboners, KaySL and MercyFML. Where are you guys, come and rescue her, it's not fair to let her get bombarded.

Keevarou and Boners are MIA, and Mercy is long gone. I killed KaySL, dismembered her, and buried her body parts in 17 different countries. That's the only way I could be sure that damned psycho never came back.

Can I just say that I love this entire thread? After she posted an incredibly stupid comment I read her description that bashes like the most intelligent commenters and says THEY'RE the morons? What the hell... I don't "do weed" hahah

#71: Nice try Doc, but when you murder, ritually disembowel, dismember, bury, then exhume and incinerate the remaining giblets of an FML commenter, you'd best be goddamned sure they're ACTUALLY dead and not just faking it! As for Sunkissedluster, well she can go fuck herself even more senseless with an oversized dildo, frankly.

I'm devastated, #81. Just had myself put on suicide watch at the local mental hospital. Will keep you updated via carrier pigeon.

So, KaySL has gone cuckoo and is communicating with us via her cuckoo? I like :)

Damn it! my contract with the carrier pigeons just ran out. I gotta go call Mike Tyson. furthermore. I'd hate to be the asshole to say it, okay I love it, but sunkissed either needs to do one of 3 things. 1: most preferably, delete their account. 2: Just stop fucking commenting. 3: Learn from pradip and actually learn from your mistakes and make good comments later on (long shot). i prefer this sister because while the other one was a dumbass, she also thought everyone was a creeper for responding to her dumbass statements and was just part of that whole, "swag or ur a hater" thing and i just cant stand that.

... Did I miss some dramatic action in the comment section of an FML? Where should I look to find enlightenment about what is going on?

Awh. You guys really got to her and she changed her description. Now I can't read that she "doesn't do weed" anymore :(

Sounds like we all dislike sunkissedluster, so apparently she should get the memo and STOP posting retarded comments!

Yes, 98. Yes it would.

I definitely think her list is a little messed up, I mean really, Docbastard? The dude is a genius.

108 that's beyond ass kissing. You must be tossing the doctor's salad.

Son of a bitch KaySL is back I liked the dildo comment but I hope she returns soon to whatever dark crevice she's been hiding in.(she scares me)

I wonder if Boners would comeback if sunkissed put him on her hate list.

Good back-rubs are pretty awesome... Maybe mix things up a little in the future? Try different things, figure out what works well for her.

My partner knows back rubs make me feel awesome (he's trained in massage therapy, and because I have Lupus, my back muscles like to seize up on me from time to time). Just need a massage bar from Lush (probably NOT the glittery one - but they're perfect, not too greasy like oil, WON'T stain the sheets), work her entire back, and then switch to OTHER parts of her body, and turn it INTO sex. ;) It feels pretty good to get a good leg massage. And breast massage. Also? Ask her what she wants you to do. Communication during AND dialogue outside of sex is pretty important.

^^^You should write a massage sex for dummies book.

Massage her before sex.

Or sex massage sex. Even better.

What?....No, just no.

Joshie, come on! We don't need to know about your "I'm just gonna stick it in" sex life.

Works for me

Assuming he has a sex life. :)

That's a loaded statement. If I say I don't I get mocked, while if I say I do then no one believes me and I get mocked.

16- I just got the comment you made. I was confused due to no commas in the sentence. I apologize.

or massage while sex ....

You should have said "If only your pussy was as tight as your back muscles."

Wow. Perfect comeback. Don't expect to get any after saying that tonight!

Q: Why do most men like women with big breasts and tight pussies? A: Because most have big mouths and small dicks

#35, hey, I resemble that remark!

Well played 35, well played.

I'm not into big breasts but tight pussy is good, not to tight though. like if a girl has a wide set vag then it doesnt feel like anything.

96, you sound like a virgin.

I like a girl who I love. I dated a girl my friends thought was I attractive. I loved her so she was the most beautiful girl in the world. Couldn't care less what cup size or how tight she is.

I attractive should be unattractive*

Hey 35 my mouth isn't that big,"goes off and cries in a corner, then comes back" we'll I didn't use to think so

Thank you for saying what I was thinking.

Lucky for you, you rub something of your own to be satisfied

Play that pussy like a harp string, and I guarantee you'll find yourself back in her good graces in no time. Clearly your gifts do not live below the belt.

At least you give a good back rub! Maybe you should do more hand stuff ;)

at least you give nice massages op

Work those magic fingers where it counts, OP!