Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, looked at me, and said, "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML
Imagery
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
Rare and inventive insult
Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML
Oddly specific question
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he’d love me if I were a worm. His answer involved chopping me in half and having a threesome. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Hangry sex
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML
Top comments
marisaichiban 0
Must have been some good chips.
Soak 0
Eh, most guys don't wanna be bugged during eating, tv, games, or with his friends
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Comments (255)
sux_2_b_me 0
You shouldn't interrupt a man during feeding time..nah for real, your dude's got some issues for turning you down. Good luck with that.
proxay 0
I ll agree with the general consensus here, and that is your timing was god-awful
hiyaa 0
the people who would love to do it all the time (#29, #39) are probably wussies who can't get any pussy. OP, don't ask for that while there's no horniness going on. and for all the supporters (especially ladies who like to scream SEXIST!!! at every possible moment-- #30 is a classic example), if you were drinking orange juice through a straw and he said "suck my duck instead," would you do that?
lil_ham1644 29
No, I would say " you got a duck?! Can I play with it?"
xhunterrrr 0
Must have been the best chips. Ever. What kind were they?
tehhotness 0
#44, what are you doing friday night?
Kellayy 0
baha potato chips ARE good :P plus he was already eating something >.
choppedNskrewed 0
chopped and skrewed!!! haha ur b/f sounds awesome
greatnt249 0
I love reading the posts from the overcompensators who think something's wrong with the guy for not wanting to lick the OP's vag at that particular time. OP, you asked at a bad time; get over it. Obviously I wasn't there to hear the convo go down, but what you wrote doesn't imply that you have a stinky vag; guys don't always drop everything they're doing just to have sex, and especially not if it's only to eat you out.
THTB 3
Lemme guess, he was munchin' on Pringles? Because Pringles > sex. AMIRITE???
aishiteiruyo 0
#4 calm down douchebag. chips taste better, of course, but you don't have to be such a dick.