Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, looked at me, and said, "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he’d love me if I were a worm. His answer involved chopping me in half and having a threesome. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML
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Top comments
marisaichiban 0
Must have been some good chips.
Soak 0
Eh, most guys don't wanna be bugged during eating, tv, games, or with his friends
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Comments (255)
stephfml 0
maybe its because you used the term "eat me"...doesnt sound very sexy or appealing now does it?
infantrygirl 0
LMFAO
rnuggs 0
id want a girl to ask me that, whats ur number lol
digapygmy 0
Hahahaha, your boyfriend. At least he has a sense of humor!!! XD
Tehalon 0
Maybe you should have asked after he was done eating chips. I would've done the same thing, tho I might have said "yeye when im done with these". Some things are just more important then sex.
claritin 0
Why would you expect him to drop everything just to pleasure you? Maybe if you asked him if he'd rather get head or eat chips I'd feel differently about this FML but seriously!? It's not like by you requesting that he eat you out, you're doing him some kind of favor. You'd be getting all of the pleasure in that situation (I mean, of course, he's supposed to get something out of pleasuring his girlfriend, but he isn't getting any sexual gratification unless you offered to reciprocate.) and really, who would want to put down their delicious and satisfying bag of chips just to get someone else off with no return? I'm not going to go down on my boyfriend if I'm doing something else and he just asks "do you want to blow me?" Get real. Don't get me wrong, I love pleasuring my man but I'm not going to drop everything to attend to his every sexual whim just as I don't expect him to do for me. (And for the record, before anyone calls me on this, we have a fantastic sex life and **** like bunnies, we're just both adults and understand that there is more to life than sex.)
Silhouette_fml 0
Lucky you. You now know for sure that your boyfriend isn't a cannibal.
Bubs_fml 0
Double standard again. Girl asks guy for oral, he says no. That apparently makes him a worthless loser and a douche. Guy goes "Hey, give me a *******." It's the same sort of thing the girl asked, however, this makes him a chauvinistic male pig. Guys can never win in these situations.
maddog_fml 0
@#57 Frans Well Frans, it starts from page 2, on top. You should know that, you'r the mod. @#48 OMG!! you are sick dude
Misanthropist 0
Do you really want soggy chip pieces in your vag anyways?