Imagery

By bunnyluver4545 - 11/01/2012 05:42 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 586
You deserved it 36 718
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Top comments

gojira666 7

Another way of saying hes got a long, thin, flaccid weiner and your ****** is large and in charge?

1531 15

Comments

HerpYourDerp 7

My eyes are burning with the imagery.

95 5
gojira666 7

Another way of saying hes got a long, thin, flaccid weiner and your ****** is large and in charge?

1531 15
ladyLALAA 28

33 I wish I could thumbs up that comment twice!

206 12
Keyman1212 14

Large and in charge is an understatement. Let's do the math. A Pringles can's circumference is roughly 9.7389", and the length of the can is 9.2". This being said, OP's boyfriend would have to have one of, if not, the thickest penis in all of recorded history to even touch the walls of her vag, and at 9.2" deep, this guy would pretty much have to be **** star status to be effective at all.

482 28
WaSiSimiLang 8

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20 35
GoW_Chick 14

I know this may sound stupid, much like your comment, but elephants don't have fingers. Well that's my dumb, pointless comment of the day.

117 24
Stroke_Her_Ace 15

Well unless you squeeze the top of this can together, I don't see how you will be picking up any noodles regardless of texture.

76 7
tuppencej777 0

Not only does his penis not fit, if he tries to use his hand, it will get stuck. Now onto that lingering sour cream and onion smell...

200 7
zakkyzebra 11

107, if you squeeze her ****** together ever so slightly, your hand will pop out! Just like a Pringles can!

9 35
FFPulley 9

Hey, even a 747 would look small landing in the Grand Canyon...

144 2
Horcruxer 0

I was still laughing at first elephant comment

6 37
angry_anonymous 5

OP should stick a blow dryer into her endless cavern and see if she can melt the bitch out of herself. it's no wonder he can't get it up when she says things like that.

3 1
nahgemoohc 17

Brings a whole new meaning to 'use your noodle', doesn't it;p

47 2
CalCommando 6

Noodle, use your noodle, noodle, do the NOODLE DANCE!

35 18
f_ckml432 8

I know the feeling... well I didn't really feel anything, but you know what I mean

361 9
girl112891 7

I was going to ask for an explanation but then I read a bunch of comment. LOL you guys are so funny! And I understand it now.

22 75
Keyman1212 14

Fail on your part for having a big ******, and fail on his part for being a limp dick'd man. You were never destined to work sexually... I'm sorry OP.

633 36
lolmonster34 0

She's needs a black guy and he needs....a virgin

1 0
Michael_92 20

Hey with todays technology and penis transplant surgery anything is possible.

19 39
Amrel 10

Home home on the range! Were the big mouth vaginas feel strange! Were nothing is good and you cant fit your wood!

177 8
JHC88 2

Are you saying you have a big ****** and he has a limp doodle? Good luck to you both (you'll need it)

190 7
jarednt39 5

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42 70
jarednt39 5

Very true also. And the fact that the female in this situation had the mentality to put on FML her size of her " " in comparison to a large hole such as a Pringles can. That is something not to be proud of.

54 12
GoW_Chick 14

38- Not all relationships get ruined by adding sex as a variable, just as long as it's not the main reason for the relationship, that's when they start to get ruined.

70 5
jarednt39 5

Oh yes I agree with you , sorry meant to put that in my first comment . In my experiences though trust started going away due to it and then caused the relationship to end.

20 10
frostburggirl15 4

While yes you are right about it not being everything in a relationship, it is eventually needed. There is a possibility you will be with someone the rest of your life, so it at least should be good/satisfying slightly

33 5
lolmonster34 0

So #53 that just means you're bad in bed

18 43
Horcruxer 0

Why would someone attention seek about having a big, loose vag?

0 0
Airman1988 9

So it's like throwing a hotdog down a hallway?

551 12
Chad_the_Brony 0

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92 29
NotDave 0

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zombicidal 11

scooter is hilarious good thing lucky busted his mamas girly parts for that comical gem

18 8
zaza_x_fml 5

Hahah what an interesting way of putting it. I'm sorry OP, but there are various solutions for these kinda problems.

17 9
juliushater 12

So your saying, you are like City Hall and he is a small kid lost inside looking for his mama ???

135 25
Keyman1212 14

Swing..... And a miss. It's just creepy that you included a child in this analogy.

88 19
GoW_Chick 14

No Keevarou, just no.

58 10
jlentriken 8

Interesting, your really loose and he's not to excited for sex with you?? Sorry op

68 8
desireev 17

^^^^^ This whole bit just made me laugh! Thanks guys! I needed it. :)

21 6