Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, looked at me, and said, "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he’d love me if I were a worm. His answer involved chopping me in half and having a threesome. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML
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Top comments
marisaichiban 0
Must have been some good chips.
Soak 0
Eh, most guys don't wanna be bugged during eating, tv, games, or with his friends
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Comments (255)
mtrem225 0
MMM.... potato chips.
PTB 0
LOL!!! wow thats hilarious
wafflemonger 0
I promise you don't want a salty tongue in your lady business. Ouchies.
captaingoldfish 0
lol #23
jesseheath 0
bahahahahahahaha **** yes.
Shadowflames420 0
LMAO. Never come between a man and his chips..... Well, is it one of his favorite things to do to you? If not, you were just being a little greedy
clitler 0
I don't know what kind of dumb **** you think you are but if I was eating potato chips and my bitch wanted me to slather her meat wallet, I'd beat that dish washing TWAT to within an inch of her worthless piece of shit life. Why don't you take one of those chips and shove it up your worthless slam hole you good for nothing **** banging sweater meat ****-banging ****!
maddog_fml 0
Fantastic!! haha! OP: First sex than food, otherwise people start throwing up and you don't want thats shit when he is eating you. #2 is right.
TheChosenOne_fml 0
Shit, he crazy??? I´d eat your pussy any day any time... A girl randomly askin 4 it? It don´t get no better! Please ask me that question if we ever meet...
Kitten125 0
#27: What the **** is WRONG with you. Don't you ever talk about women like that you god damned sexist bastard. SAD: Come on OP, you got to admit it was a really random time to ask.....