Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, looked at me, and said, "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he’d love me if I were a worm. His answer involved chopping me in half and having a threesome. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML
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Top comments
marisaichiban 0
Must have been some good chips.
Soak 0
Eh, most guys don't wanna be bugged during eating, tv, games, or with his friends
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Comments (255)
gret1042 0
wow any guy that does that is a complete tool and or gay, it makes no sense, u should find someone that is willing to do that for you anytime
patrickhb 0
LOL at the people saying he should be dumped for saying no.
eeee93757 0
Don't take his response to heart, us men don't like to be interrupted while we're eating and such.
noclevername 0
Gg #63. That sounds like it was a joke. Even if it wasn't, though, it's perfectly fair. Being a girl, I can't tell how serious all the "Don't bother him when he's eating!" comments are, but for my own part, if I'm eating crisps or junk food it's because I feel like relaxing and being lazy. If my boyfriend happened to be there during that, and asked if I wanted to give him a ******* - well, if I'm feeling generous I might, but it won''t be my first preference. And I wouldn't ask him spontaneously in that situation if he wanted to eat me out, because why would he?
Tripodi 0
I'm guessing #23 would know hahaha
B_Tenor 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHG A HAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AH AHAHA AHAH AHA AH AHA HAHAHAHAHAQHAHAHAHAZHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
aaronquixotic 0
Wow, trashy.
ElleEnvy 0
Would you really want him eating you out after he had a bag of chips? Gross much?
OhSoFoxy 0
"****** doesn't taste all that great anyway, and it's a lot of work for really no benefit to the man." The same can be said about ********, but we do it anyway.
dg72592_fml 0
this is why you date black guys.