Caught red handed

By scarred_sibling - 15/10/2012 12:10 - United States

Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 449
You deserved it 3 047

Same thing different taste

Top comments

If it can fit in a lotion bottle, I'm assuming it was too small for you to see too much anyway.

Your skin has been really smooth and silky lately though, right?


That xD get new lotion and hide it from him

JocelynKaulitz 28
habibiiiiiii 2

Either her brother has a small john or, she had a big bottle of lotion.

zuzupetalsYO 11

It's better than the Original Poster walking in on her brother using a donut to get off (FML reference). So, OP, look at the bright side, you can find a new expensive lotion and still enjoy donuts!

Your skin has been really smooth and silky lately though, right?

Fishinaddict22 1

"It rubs the lotion on its skin. Wait, what? No! Get your dick out of the bottle!"

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Silence of the Lambs reference. A mediocre one, but recognisable.

Hahaha. Always funny when someone ignorantly calls someone else out on something and ends up being wrong.

KaeporaGaebora 4

He wasn't entirely wrong. The entire quote shouldn't gave been in quotations.

Wow I get the movie reference, the second part isn't in the movie though.

Fishinaddict22 1

Yes, I was referring to the movie but I wasn't necessarily quoting it. I was more using the quotes as someone talking. Sorry for the confusion there guys, was just supposed to be funny.

Quotation marks aren't just for direct quotes, they could also be used for dialogue, which is obviously what he meant to do.

klrindal 2

Get him to buy you a new bottle.

And a brand new bottle opportunity after he suddenly runs out of the last one.

If it can fit in a lotion bottle, I'm assuming it was too small for you to see too much anyway.

Okay so maybe he could get it in there thanks to the lotion, but how the hell is he going to get it out?

60: wait for his Willie to shrivel... if you know what I mean

Inheritance 10

I'm curious to how old he is. If he's older and small he has a problem, now if he's young and small then well he has time to develop.

Indeed.. that was first thing I thought.... "If its small enough to fit in a lotion bottle... damn.. I feel sorry for him"

But it doesn't say OP's age. A young person will have a tiny Tim instead of a russel the wonder muscle.

I'm assuming he is younger because I'm hoping most older people wouldn't put it in a bottle.

Or even if they tried to it wouldn't fit.

william8691 10

I'm assuming he's really young cause I've never seen a lotion bottle with a big enough hole to fit a penis in otherwise I'd do it too.... But thats just me...

priceyfml 7

Your profile picture .... (>^(>0.0)>

Your profile picture... -3. Haha sorry, couldn't resist. I REALLY hate the Habs. More than a Leafs fan.

Or get a girlfriend... Warm and wet>>>

Are you sure it was lotion that you'v been using all this time?

florido_fml 10

I'm thinking there's more than just lotion in that bottle after he's done.

He's trying to make you a skin ointment for your butt acne

Hey more lotion for better motion I guess OP.

Um sorry Joker.... The batman is cool though.