Sex, Inappropriate and Intimacy: Bruh…

Bruh…

By ... - 06/06/2011 07:44 - Australia

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that fist pumping during sex is not romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 751

You deserved it 6 713

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Same thing different taste

Wanker

By alicia - 20/12/2012 22:45 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I had to explain to my fiancé that having me watch him jerk off over a porno is not in fact considered foreplay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 295

You deserved it 11 977

By O_o - 09/02/2014 00:42 - United States - Simi Valley

Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 242

You deserved it 6 673

By Great. - 18/05/2012 15:05 - United States - Billings

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 003

You deserved it 5 338

Pick your moments, dude!

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 00:01

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 891

You deserved it 333

Sensual world

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 15:05 - United Kingdom - Eastleigh

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend about the importance of foreplay, and that attempting to get me "in the mood" by whipping his cock out and air humping was roughly equivalent to throwing a dry teabag at me and claiming he made a cup of tea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 211

You deserved it 3 007

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 06:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 881

You deserved it 4 389

Bored

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 18:00

Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 380

By BustedEgo - 23/03/2014 05:31 - United States - Norway

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 797

You deserved it 7 321

Valid reason

By stephhh055 - 21/10/2019 16:00 - United States - Portland

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 468

You deserved it 265

By Clare - 21/02/2011 23:15 - Canada

Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 832

You deserved it 7 599

iAmScrubs 19

Monday 6 June 2011 15:49

he's got the heart of a champion. Don't take that away from him.

mkbeautymama 0

Monday 6 June 2011 15:52

that's like getting your ass slapped after, and "good game"

Comments

grantyboi 0

Monday 6 June 2011 16:41

@27 I have never heard of "fish pumping"

BShady96 0

Monday 6 June 2011 16:47

what about dick pumping?

zojieeu 6

Monday 6 June 2011 17:21

nice one dude :D

swimming2014 0

Monday 11 July 2011 3:52

hahahaha!!! amazing!:)

jobsman99 0

Monday 6 June 2011 16:49

you should be pumping your fist on him. or he could be pumping his fist with you

Shadow4i5 3

Monday 6 June 2011 16:55

ur not even from New Jersey n ur boyfriends weird

Ikdiy2009 0

Monday 6 June 2011 17:00

what a loser

matt0794 1

Monday 6 June 2011 17:17

since when?

austin0023 0

Monday 6 June 2011 17:30

dick

poopdayz 6

Monday 6 June 2011 17:31

Did he head bang too?

denbeste 3

Monday 6 June 2011 17:42

#35 fish pumping is what guys at the gym do...

rjflores 0

Monday 6 June 2011 17:45

yes it is.

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Kids Birthday Money Cute Weird Awkward Health Love Abuse Relatable Scams Social Media School Education Parents Anger issues Teenagers Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Geek Music Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I met my boyfriend in Hong Kong after being apart for almost 6 months. We got to our room and got right down to business. I was just about to come when a voice came over the PA system in the room. "This is just a fire alarm test, sorry for any inconvenience." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 131

You deserved it 5 932

Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 134

The Top

Today, my mum wants me to see a psychologist because I've been acting strange lately. If by "strange" she means "not wanting to die any more", then sure. But thanks, I could've used that psychologist 3 years ago when I asked for one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 113

You deserved it 1 381

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 533

You deserved it 3 598

Today, I went to get an ultrasound of my reproductive system done because I was having some abdominal pain. Everything was fine until the tech suddenly gasped and said, "Oh my God! You have two uteruses! Want me to print off a picture so you can show them off to your friends?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 830

You deserved it 3 575

Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I quietly managed to get my clothes back on and get out the door without waking her. I made it all the way out of her building and to my car before I realized I had forgotten my keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 362

You deserved it 112 388

Today, I rode the public bus. When I got off, I put my hood up only to discover that the old man who sat behind me had used my hood as a trashcan for his gum and used Kleenex. I can't get the gum out of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 816

You deserved it 2 660

Today, my nose was really stuffy. I heard somewhere that inhaling tea steam clears up the nose. While reading a magazine I inhaled my cup of green tea steam, without knowing that slowly I was moving my cup closer to my nose. Hot tea was sucked into my left nostril and burned the inside badly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 091

You deserved it 35 892