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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. Turns out they are firing 35 people. I wasn't on the list until I asked for a raise. FML

#7424503
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27231) - you deserved it (6698)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:41pm - work - by SadMan (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I met my new college room-mate. He then introduced me to his imaginary friend. FML

#7423840
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28356) - you deserved it (2496)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51937) - you deserved it (8122)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I bought a fake "wedding ring" at Target to play a prank on my parents. They kicked me out, saying my "fiancé" can take care of me now. There is no fiancé, and I just lost my job. FML

#7420544
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10205) - you deserved it (37506)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:12pm - love - by Crissylove10 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom asked me to clean beneath my brother's bed for money. I found a rotten apple, a picture of my best friend, and a dead bird. I got $10. FML

#7420452
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28751) - you deserved it (4358)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:04pm - kids - by Brotherssuckkk - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw Avatar in iMax 3D. Towards the end of the movie I jump, yelled, and spilled my drink all over the people in front of me because I thought a burning piece of ash landed on my leg. FML

#7420150
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8015) - you deserved it (39833)

On 01/18/2010 at 2:39pm - misc - by burnedboy (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to find my freshly dry-cleaned $200 suit not on my bed. Instead I found my drunk ex-girlfriend. Not only did she break into my house, she decided that she wanted to sleep in my bed and threw my suit into the trash. I have a job interview today and the garbage men already came. FML

#7418364
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27521) - you deserved it (2519)

On 01/18/2010 at 12:05pm - misc - by Sam (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a letter in the mail, my mother has applied for a reduction in her child support payments for my brother and I. She's paid $10 child support in 16 years. FML

#7416712
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29474) - you deserved it (1813)

On 01/18/2010 at 9:23am - money - by bluewatersify - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I received a message from front desk that my concerned father is trying to contact me. I call only to hear that my parents were freaking out that I wasn't answering my phone. They saw me 9 hours ago. They were going to call the police. I'm in college and also don't live with them anymore. FML

#7416105
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28120) - you deserved it (2095)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:28am - misc - by over_protected (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my estranged, alcoholic father decided to tell me I have a sister. After 30 mins of him describing how beautiful she is and how much we look alike and how she has lived one town away from me her entire life, I was excited to the point of tears. Too bad she died a year ago. Thanks dad. FML

#7415965
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39966) - you deserved it (1935)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:49am - misc - by Mills (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

#7415658
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9352) - you deserved it (58949)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, my rabbit died. He died a painful death from ingesting too much carpet. I now have no rabbit and a patchy carpet. FML

#7414991
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25469) - you deserved it (6017)

On 01/18/2010 at 4:00am - misc - by Radioo (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I tried to quit my job. My boss just looked at me and said, "No. You can't quit." FML

#7414727
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28743) - you deserved it (6098)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:28am - work - by toolegittoquit (woman) - United States (Washington)



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