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Today, my daughter watched a potty training video on Sesame Street. In the middle of the video, she got up and ran to her potty to practice. She then announced, "All done!", and proudly closed the lid to her potty. She then immediately stood on top of it and peed. FML

#13252455
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23531) - you deserved it (3168)

On 09/29/2010 at 6:47pm - kids - by Mommy (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked into my house with my friend, only to discover my husband half-naked and yelling at the TV screen over a soccer game. By half-naked, I mean he was only wearing a shirt. FML

#20169569
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23530) - you deserved it (2530)

On 11/19/2012 at 2:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was asked to cover work for someone because they have volleyball practice. Apparently, they haven't noticed that we've been on the same team for two years. FML

#21451556
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23530) - you deserved it (1628)

On 08/03/2015 at 10:48pm - work - by eventer1919 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was at a club with my friends and my friend got really drunk. Later on he came up to me and said he really needed to pee but he was too drunk to work the zipper, and asked if I could help. When I finally unzipped him, he was so desperate to go he pissed in my face. FML

#8382475
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23529) - you deserved it (9213)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:24pm - misc - by missunlucky (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML

#19986009
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23529) - you deserved it (2116)

On 07/26/2012 at 8:46pm - misc - by Carrie G. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking to my friend about my life and she stopped me mid-sentence and told me that my life makes her sad. FML

#4714
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23528) - you deserved it (2575)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:37pm - misc - by why... - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML

#8506785
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23527) - you deserved it (3615)

On 02/21/2010 at 3:19am - intimacy - by horny21 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend used my love handles as ACTUAL love handles. FML

#13431073
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23525) - you deserved it (19154)

On 10/13/2010 at 4:36am - intimacy - by Abused (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I waited in line at Subway. There were two people in front of me. The first lady had seven sandwiches and the second lady had four. So after patiently waiting, I ordered my sandwich, only to have my credit card declined. FML

#13453945
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23524) - you deserved it (11283)

On 10/15/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by bcf1234 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML

#20082214
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23522) - you deserved it (4456)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to explain to my brother why he can't go on dates with my new boyfriend and me. FML

#19469205
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23521) - you deserved it (2318)

On 04/14/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by ProsserBabe11 (woman) - United States

Today, my brother and I had a long argument. He believes wholeheartedly that pineapples are not actually fruits, but berries. When I showed him a google search, he accused me of "faking" it. FML

#21410455
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23521) - you deserved it (3485)

On 05/15/2015 at 9:58am - misc - by Anon - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the mall got evacuated while I was getting my hair colored. I am now standing outside of a crowded mall, wearing a showercap. FML

#19833601
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (2712)

On 06/23/2012 at 11:11am - misc - by tylah - United States (New Jersey)



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