Furniture

Warehouse blues

By Anonymous - 12/09/2025 22:00

Today, I got up early to wait for my new sofa to be delivered. I spent yesterday taking apart and getting rid of my old crappy sofa. At midday, the furniture shop said they'd cancelled my order due to not having enough of that model in stock. Even if I re-order a sofa now, it's 2 weeks until they can deliver. FML

agreeclassic 388

vote type 1 80

Clever

By Anonymous - 15/07/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son got his furniture delivered: one massive, super comfy armchair for him, followed by the lowest, most angular, most uncomfortable sofa I’ve ever sat on. Turns out he did this on purpose so that guests can’t get comfy and are compelled to leave as quickly as possible. Introverted tool. FML

agreeclassic 216

vote type 1 471

Gimme a break

By Respect the handyman - 01/04/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, after days of my wife nagging me, I started working on the flat pack furniture she ordered. Every twenty minutes, she interrupted me to demand I stop and help her with something trivial and irrelevant. Now I remember why I postpone projects as long as possible. FML

agreeclassic 401

vote type 1 118

No friends, no problems

By Anonymous - 27/03/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son got the last of his furniture delivered and finally moved into his first house. This boy has exactly one chair, a massive armchair pointed at the TV. When I asked him where the hell visitors are supposed to sit, he said that visitors generally won’t be welcome, even me. FML

agreeclassic 175

vote type 1 447

How to dismantle flat pack furniture

By Anonymous - 08/01/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I spent hours assembling a bookshelf I'd bought online. Once it was finally done, I realized I’d put the back panel on backwards, so now there’s a "Made in China" label facing the room. FML

agreeclassic 159

vote type 1 433

PIVOT!

By SofaKingAnnoying - 25/12/2024 20:00 - Belgium - Kasterlee

Today, the couch I ordered finally arrived. It was a long search and a little expensive but worth it for the extra comfort. It is perfect, except for the fact that it doesn't fit thought the staircase of my building. Now it's standing in the hallway because they won't take it back. FML

agreeclassic 204

vote type 1 447

Patience

By Anonymous - 18/12/2024 16:00 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, my wife texted me, saying an expensive piece of furniture had been delivered. I specifically said, "Wait until I get home and we'll put it together." An hour later, she opened it and broke it beyond repair while trying to assemble it herself. FML

agreeclassic 565

vote type 1 105

To the left of what?

By Anonymous - 21/11/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband moved all the furniture a few inches to the left because he saw online that it makes moving around the house really difficult, and he wanted to test it out. Unfortunately, the one who tested it out was me; I got home, went to sit down, and broke 2 toes on the coffee table. FML

agreeclassic 492

vote type 1 114

FINNBY boss

By danny - 03/10/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent two hours building an IKEA bookshelf. When I was finished, I realized it was inside-out. There was no way to fix it without completely taking it apart again. FML

agreeclassic 177

vote type 1 460

PIVOT!

By D.M - 29/09/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, while moving a couch and repeatedly asking my dad what he was trying to do and him ignoring me, I got my hand slammed between the corner of the couch and a doorway, because my dad shoved the couch without saying anything. I was holding the corner to stop it from falling on me. FML

agreeclassic 434

vote type 1 86

Bad doggo!

By Vicky - 22/09/2024 14:00 - Australia

Today, I came home to find that my dog had destroyed my couch. The worst part? He buried his plastic toy bone inside the wreckage, so he clearly thinks this is his new personal sandbox play pit spot. I'm afraid to get a new couch and put it in the same place. FML

agreeclassic 333

vote type 1 146

This is mine now

By K……y - 06/09/2024 16:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, my new couch was delivered. As the delivery guys left, I came back into the living room and noticed a bad but familiar smell. I turned the couch cushions over to discover that my cat had already claimed it as her personal litter tray. The return policy doesn’t cover "cat defilement." FML

agreeclassic 223

vote type 1 469

Heavy

By Destructive - 25/02/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my chair abruptly fell apart completely while I was sitting on it. I didn't even do anything. Have I really gained that much weight? FML

agreeclassic 379

vote type 1 187

Nice try

By grovage - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML

agreeclassic 5 793

vote type 1 82 038

Step by step

By IKEA SUCKS - 22/11/2023 16:00

Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that boasted "easy, step-by-step instructions." Three hours later, surrounded by mismatched screws and a confusing diagram, I realized the only thing "easy" about it was my decision to ask my dad to come round and assemble it for me. FML

agreeclassic 191

vote type 1 426

Damn you, Ikea!

By xXrememberthisXx - 16/10/2023 06:30

Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that claimed to be "easy to build in minutes." Four hours and multiple arguments later, I realized I had misread the instructions, and half the parts were upside down. I'm pretty sure the furniture won this round. FML

agreeclassic 237

vote type 1 727

Stable

By Anonymous - 14/09/2023 04:00 - United States - Asheboro

Today, after I bought a bedframe a few days ago that was up for sale with a sign next to it that said "The best you can ever find! Very supportive and stable!" guess what happened? It shattered into small splinters. I’m literally underweight, too. FML

agreeclassic 600

vote type 1 141

Broke

By Anonymous - 26/07/2023 12:00 - United States - Warren

Today, most of the stuff in my house is falling apart due to the fact that I don't have enough money to buy things that last. My lampshades ended up getting torn to shreds when I tried gently dusting them, then the base fell out of my lamp when I went to move it to clean up around it to vacuum. FML

agreeclassic 676

vote type 1 184

Fantasy

By But I wanna - 15/05/2023 23:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, despite being married and renting my own apartment, I can't fulfil my teenage dream of slamming my wife on the sofa and pounding her like cheap mince, all because it would apparently "defile the sofa for the children." FML

agreeclassic 1 062

vote type 1 433

Bad boy

By lukey101 - 27/03/2023 16:00

Today, my puppy celebrated a milestone by lifting his leg to pee for the first time. Too bad it was up against my brand new soft fabric couch. FML

agreeclassic 656

vote type 1 188

Last laugh

By Anonymous - 21/03/2023 18:00

Today, my ex-roommate, who decided to move out when my other roommate and I told her we didn't want a giant dresser for her dogs' clothes and stuff in the dining room, took the door knob out of the door to her former bedroom and threw some of my things in the recycling bin. FML

agreeclassic 767

vote type 1 124

****** around, found out

By Anonymous - 01/03/2023 04:00 - United States

Today, I tried to decorate my coffee table by following a DIY project I found on Pinterest, but I ended up ruining it and now have to buy a new one instead. FML

agreeclassic 229

vote type 1 812

Raining cats and dogs

By Fling! - 29/11/2022 05:00 - United States

Today, I tried to put my reclining chair back. My cat and dog were sitting on the very top. It went up in an unexpectedly forceful manner, sending them flying, causing my dog to fall, and my cat to cling for dear life. FML

agreeclassic 636

vote type 1 361

Trash the lot

By Anonymous - 16/10/2022 16:00

Today, I was sleeping with my girlfriend on my parents' bed naked, just to wake up to find out she got her period, on fresh, new sheets they bought the other day. As I finished scrubbing it and cleaning, she accidentally left a burning cigarette on the sheets so now it has a burn hole too. FML

agreeclassic 242

vote type 1 2 843

Heavy duty

By Anonymous - 05/06/2022 12:00

Today, my husband has destroyed 4 mattresses in 6 years, not through accidental fires or anything, not even through vigorous sex, it’s just that his 24-stone bulk crushes the springs, wears divots in the memory foam, and eventually splits the fabric so the stuffing leaks out. Every time. FML

agreeclassic 777

vote type 1 220

Get it out!

By Anonymous - 21/10/2020 09:01 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, I paid movers $125 to move a couch into my house that's much too large for the space. FML

agreeclassic 421

vote type 1 1 060

This sparks joy

By Repethetic - 02/04/2015 12:20 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend when we came across the most beautiful piece of Japanese furniture. When I inspected it closely, my boyfriend started laughing. Turns out I was making the same noise I make when I orgasm in reaction to a piece of furniture. FML

agreeclassic 28 956

vote type 1 4 890

DIY FML

By ko. - 03/01/2015 17:53

Today, my boyfriend told me he'd come over and help me move a heavy dresser so I could paint the wall behind it. After an hour of waiting for him, I decided to move it myself. He finally arrived, not ten minutes after I broke my toe when I accidentally dropped the dresser on it. FML

agreeclassic 30 200

vote type 1 9 742

Model behavior

By anonymous - 15/04/2013 01:07 - United States - La Pine

Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML

agreeclassic 40 956

vote type 1 5 175

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML

agreeclassic 37 839

vote type 1 3 613

Today, I was overseeing a nativity play rehearsal. Things went fairly well, until a boy's grandma stormed in, ranting that Christmas is a "Pagan abomination", and shouting for him and his mom to leave with her. Half the kids were left in tears, and we had to cancel the rehearsal. FML

agreeclassic 28 192

vote type 1 3 014

Today, my friend informed me that his dog died. Hoping to cheer him up, I sent him a random meme. My dumb ass mistakenly sent him a meme about dead dogs. FML

agreeclassic 175

vote type 1 1 584

Today, I was sitting at lunch and started choking on a chip. I couldn't breathe and nobody tried to help me. Having to take matters into my own hands, I reached for a juice box that belonged to someone sitting next to me. After I could breathe again, they informed me that they had mono. FML

agreeclassic 36 145

vote type 1 5 010

Today, an old man looked me dead in the eyes as he reached into my tip jar, grabbed the money, and then walked out of the store as if nothing ever happened. I was so shocked that I couldn't do anything to stop him. FML

agreeclassic 42 788

vote type 1 10 764

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML

agreeclassic 56 088

vote type 1 7 436