Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my band got booed off stage. FML

#12470997
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23412) - you deserved it (45401)

On 08/12/2010 at 2:53am - work - by malos - United States

Today, I went to a family funeral. Talking to my grandfather, trying the make chitchat, he says "You're gaining weight, aren't you?" FML

#8683563
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23410) - you deserved it (3985)

On 02/27/2010 at 5:15am - misc - by livvlynette (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was notified I'm being discharged after 2 weeks because my employers don't have the time to train me at my first real job in 6 years. FML

#21431811
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23409) - you deserved it (1644)

On 06/25/2015 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, we were closing the restaurant early. I begin mopping as a couple walks in. The lady slips and falls, and to avoid a lawsuit, we offer them free food. After they left, I slipped on the freshly mopped kitchen floor with dishes in my hands. I didn't get free food. FML

#13056809
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23407) - you deserved it (8270)

On 09/15/2010 at 12:24am - work - by clumsyandhungry (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a text message from my boss that read, "You've been very bad. Severe punishment is in order." I'm not sure whether I should be turned on or terrified. FML

#20110308
153 comments

Today, I was making my bed which would normally be a simple task, until I leaned into the wooden foot of my bed, and put my entire body weight on my left nut. FML

#13364492
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23404) - you deserved it (9849)

On 10/08/2010 at 6:53am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about extinct peoples, and I said how close the Jewish people came to becoming one. She condescendingly told me they don't exist anymore. When I asked what she was talking about, I realized she was confusing them with the Vikings. What the hell? FML

#20126556
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23405) - you deserved it (2913)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by tempted to become single (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML

#20050170
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23400) - you deserved it (1474)

On 08/30/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I brought my girlfriend over to her first dinner with my family. My gramps spent the entire dinner telling my girlfriend how the Illuminati are plotting to take over the world and use microchips to control everyone. So much for being taken seriously now. FML

#18284255
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23399) - you deserved it (2923)

On 11/18/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Trey - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my academic counselor to help me deal with my stress and anxiety, which has been making me nauseous from the constant strain. She suggested exercise to help these feelings. Every time I do so, I vomit. From the anxiety and stress. FML

#5932326
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23398) - you deserved it (4887)

On 10/21/2009 at 6:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home to find my drunken father sitting on our front lawn. He had a blanket, lit candle, and was singing with his eyes closed. He told me he believed he was Buddha from watching the history channel. Meanwhile, cars were driving by our house beeping, and yelling "praise the lord!" FML

#13120508
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23396) - you deserved it (2476)

On 09/19/2010 at 10:13pm - misc - by embaressed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got my first driving lesson from my dad. We traded seats, I started the car and his entire lesson was, "Go." FML

#18475909
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23396) - you deserved it (3539)

On 12/10/2011 at 11:45am - misc - by Maggie (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML

#19714803
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23396) - you deserved it (4408)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:24am - love - by Silent (man) - Singapore



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: